Lost Love or Never Loved At All
by messerpadfootforever
Summary: 'Screw Dumbledore. I'm getting out.'-Deserae Jones, what can go wrong when you're a Slytherin witch with a complicated past and best friends with Draco Malfoy? Read to find out! It could get graphic in later chapters, slightly OOC and AU. HIATUS :(
1. Into the Unknown

A/N_  
_This is my first fanfiction so please be nice and give me a review! I have more updates on the way just want to see the response to this. If there's anything you don't understand, it will soon be explained. Literally.

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_You're worthless._ An eerie inner voice mocked and it echoed through her mind. _Why didn't you die in your sleep?_ A loud bang came from downstairs and she sprang upright. Footsteps proceeded around the first floor and then clanged up the staircase. _Not again…_ she thought. Instead of doing what she would normally do in this situation, she slowly formed a devious plan in her mind. She pulled back her quilt and swung her legs over into the darkness beside her bed. She silently rose to her feet and gathered pillows together on the bed to look like she still slept underneath the covers.

She paused to think again for a moment, was getting expelled worth freedom? _Screw Dumbledore. I'm getting out._ She smirked at her thoughts before grabbing for her wand that lay in the box underneath her bed. Her Uncle hated her being a witch and told her if she ever dared mention Hogwarts or anything magical, she would be put into an orphanage. _Heartless prick._ She often thought this about him, but other than his hatred for the thing that killed his beloved sister and his best friend, and being an alcoholic, he was a genuinely nice guy. When the cold smooth wood of her Redwood wand touched her fingers, she felt more confident and determined to make her great escape, but as to where she was still clueless. She listened to the bangs and stomps of her Uncle John as he reached the top of the stairs. Following her newly formed plan, she dropped to the floor and wriggled into the dust and darkness that enclosed the space below her bed.

She lay under the bed for what seemed like ages, listening to the noises from beyond her bedroom door. Then startling her, the door slammed open, clashed with the wall, and her Uncle flopped onto the bed above her. As his heavy breathing began to even out above her, she started to wriggle, not out the way she came in, but through the bottom, towards the door.

The person above her made the bed creak as they rolled over, and she froze. A few moments passed and snoring started, she thought it was safe to begin her wriggling again. Her feet were pointed to the door and she kept as quiet as she could, not daring to breathe while listening to the steady heavy breathing above her.

Her legs were out from underneath the bed, another minute or two and she would be out in the open. Her stomach began to tighten and her heart beat faster, thudding gently in her ears. Her waist was out now, and she still concentrated on the movements and breathing above her, only just remembering to breathe herself.  
Her neck was the only thing still under the bed._ I can do this. Once I get out of here, I'll get a job somewhere in Diagon Alley or if I'm lucky I won't be expelled and I can go back to school!_ As her mind continued buzzing along this line of thought, she realized she was now staring at a dark ceiling. She panicked slightly but then concentrated looking about without moving too much.

Her room was much the same as usual, except there was a slight dent where the door had made contact with the wall. The soft snoring continued through her train of thought and she quickly realised it was safe to continue out the open door. She rolled silent as a mouse onto her belly and then spun to face the door again. Her freedom seemed so near but she wasn't out of the woods yet. She focused on the noises the large body on her bed was making, while doing an army crawl closer to the door. The bed creaked again and she stopped dead.

The huge lump made a loud snort, a sickly wheezing sound and then continued snoring like a pig. She was at the door and soon she'd be beyond the boundaries of the shapes view. She smelled the carpet of the hallway and her mind raced and her heart leaped as freedom was in sight. Her elbows now scraped the carpet and her body warmed in excitement. She could stand now and silently get some belongings from the cupboard, and leave without a note to say goodbye. So she pushed up with her elbows and onto her knees and slowly got her feet firmly onto the aging carpet. Another snort came from behind her and fearing she had made too much noise, panicked again.  
Her body became cold but slightly damp with a worried sweat. She gracefully and memorably moved her body to the left, and took 3 steps forward, stretched out her right hand and placed it onto a rough wooden doorknob. She turned her hand and the door opened slowly and without noise, and she took time to examine the room, pointlessly checking for anyone waiting on her.  
After checking carefully, she took another few steps into the dark room. Her eyes wandered to the window, where she could see the peaceful, empty street below. She suddenly felt very alone and even more scared than when she was under the bed hiding. Remembering her plan, she moved closer to the window and again turned to her left and drew up to an old chest of drawers. Most of her stuff was thrown out when she moved into her Uncle's semi detached, but the most precious things and some important garments of hers where locked in the large bottom drawer.

She always locked her private drawer, which she now cursed herself for doing. Her previous excitement at maybe going back to Hogwarts was wiped from her mind, along with any other sane, coherent thought. She prayed to Merlin that she had remembered to put on her necklace as her hand rose to meet a thin silver chain and a delicate key. She lifted the chain from around her neck, and leaned down to slot the key into the rusting hole. She turned the key counter clockwise and she heard a faint click. If she was going to be expelled she could have used an unlocking charm, but seeing as she had no dire need for magic yet, she wasn't going to be stupid. She paused before she opened the drawer to listen to the sleeping lumps snoring; after a few seconds of listening, she thought it was safe to open the drawer.

The locked drawer had concealed all her old textbooks from her first and second year at Hogwarts, her letters from her friends and school, school robes along with her tie, some oversized dull shirts, a few pairs of rumpled up faded denim jeans and an old antique jewellery box. It had an intricate flower design, the painted flowers had started to fade and the corners of the box had been a bit battered. She gently lifted out the box and smiled, remembering the day she got this.  
It was before she was trapped in this horrid place, when her parents were alive and she still had a baby sister on the way. They were picking out nice things for the baby's room and her mother thought this would be a sweet addition to her growing collection of trinket boxes. Alicia would have been beautiful. She was wrenched back to the present moment with a wet face and a dribbling nose, forgetting her current situation. She found her school trunk the corner of the room and quietly pulled it over to the drawer. She loaded her books and clothes into the brown case and then looked to the box again. She made up her mind and threw it in along with the rest of her stuff. Once everything was packed she closed the drawer again and locked it, turning the key the opposite direction from before. She slowly got to her feet and taking a second look back out onto the deserted street below, she left the room trunk lugging behind her, tears still sliding silently down her face.


	2. Latenight Wanderings

She made her way down the hall past her room where the sleeping body still lay, and past her little sisters baby room; for a moment she thought about going in to have one last look but she didn't dare, she would lose what little control she still had. She walked on and passed her Uncle's room, where she knew disgusting filth and grime built up happily. She came to the top of the stair case and took one sweeping look back down the hall, where she would never find old things of her parents or see the physical proof they existed.  
She crept down the flight of stairs quickly, fearing the worst, but her heart knew she might see freedom, for the first time in 6 years. Not risking another second she moved to the door, and carefully slid out into the moonlit street. She silently rejoiced at how far she'd come, and her heart beat fast and strong beneath her oversized top, much like the ones in her very heavy trunk she struggled to pull along. She still stood praising her confidence, while looking round the dilapidated garden. There was no grass, but broken tiles and dirty grey concrete ground.  
She despised what he'd done to her mother's beautiful rose garden. Mother… she would have blown her nut if she seen her garden now. She laughed to herself and picturing her mother yelling and slapping her brother. She let her mind wander back to when she was 7 and she was helping her mother spruce up the garden; her mother would watch over everything she was doing in her garden, showing her how to carefully remove the dead leaves and water the growing roses tenderly. She walked to the end of the garden, still remembering her mother and tiny details about everything she did, the way she walked, the way she waved her wand, the distinct noise of her apparating home after her day at the Ministry, the way she smelled and how she would cook the most amazing cookies when something was wrong with her little angel. She continued to walk to the end of her street, and not thinking where to go.

She stopped short and actually put her brain into gear. I'll go to Dray's place for a while. I miss him. So she changed her path, crossing the deserted road and walking with a purpose this time. She walked for what felt like hours, but enjoying her new found freedom, until she came to a posh area, where all the houses had well-trimmed gardens, flashy cars, brick wall fences and big ornate gates to keep out the unwanted. She knew very well she was not like these people, and that she was unwanted as company to many of these people. These people… They were sickening, with their cultures and social rules; a foot out of line and you would be considered a cat among the lions, out of your league. She hated everything about these people, except for Draco's family.  
His family did believe in power and blood status, but once they'd met her and got to know her, they weren't completely pure-blood lunatics. His family had welcomed her into their home when her family died, along with her chance of freedom. She had hope always in this family, and she knew that they would help and hide her from that man she was forced to live with. She continued walking until she reached his beautiful brick red and black gated house. The garden had rich green grass and gorgeous purple and pink pansies lining the square grass plot. There were also rose bushes in large terracotta pots beside the huge red door. She felt relief for the first time in years and felt almost peaceful, even though her insides were more jumbled up and in a knot than they were when she was sneaking out from below her rickety old bed. She fiddled with the black twisted latch of the gate then closed it behind her. She glided up the path past a locked garage, containing their muggle family car, a sleek and shiny Jeep, and Draco's silver motorbike and god knows how many Firebolts. She now stood at the bottom of stairs leading up to the door. She felt like running; she had stopped being proud for her great escape and was now exhilarated to see her best friend again, after so long.

Her heart was dancing with excitement and she could barely keep her hand from shaking as she knocked the door. She waited anxiously, shifting foot from foot. Until eventually she heard footsteps on the stairs and saw a shadow in the window of the door. She heard the clicks of latches being unlocked and finally after many more thundering heartbeats, the door swung open to reveal a small wrinkled house elf. It didn't look very happy at this late night visit but still showed appreciation of being in the Malfoy Manor.

The elf stared blankly for a few seconds, taking in what they were seeing; she could practically hear the cog's starting and clanking away, until everything clicked in their brain. The elf's tennis ball shaped eyes widened, their ears perked up, suddenly awake and interested now.

"Miss Jones, it is a pleasure to see you! We was not expecting you! Should I go wake Master Draco?" was squeaked before the little house elf was picked up into her arms and hugged fiercely.

"Oh Dinker I missed you!" she set the flustered elf down and smiled broadly at her. "And if I may, I would like to wake Draco, it would be a brilliant surprise." She finished the sentence with a smirk her best friend would be proud of as Dinker led her into the house.

When she looked around her, she was shocked to see how much bloody white marble they had! The stairs were pristine white marble, with black iron snakes as posts along the rail. The floor was, of course, white marble, with little flecks of black and green dotted about. The living room was to the left side of the entrance hall, with velvety green sofas and black end tables accompanied with small black lamps. The white marble floor stood out contrasting with the white fireplace that was unlit but had a neat stack of firewood and not a speck of dirt. To the other side of the entrance hall was a sort of dark varnished dining table, dark wooden chairs up each side, with green cushioning and perfectly set places. There was a marvellous chandelier that hung a few feet above the table top, glinting silver. Everything looked so picturesque and perfect.

"Dinker will be happy to take Miss Jones up to Master Draco's room as long as Miss Jones does not wake Master's Malfoy. They is not wanting to be awake just yet." Dinker looked very happy to have her in the house and promptly took her up the marble stair case and down a long hallway until they reached a door with a simple tag saying it was her friends' room.

"Dinker, will you be a sweetheart and bring us some breakfast, the usual please? Thank you very much." She knew how happy saying please and thank you made the little elf and smiled, as she let herself into Draco's room. She silently prowled to the bed and pounced on the lump in the middle of the bed, landing painfully on her stomach and his side. She smirked and then unleashed her tickle attack on him unexpectedly. He woke with a start and immediately flew from the bed in a crouch, ready to take on whatever the bloody hell jumped on him. He visibly relaxed seeing his friend and went back to his bed, to sit down. She smiled at him and he smiled back. No need for words, no explanation of what happened this time. He knew all too well, she'd been here many times since her parents' death and they were quite accustomed to her unsuspected visits late at night. He was sitting beside her now and they sat in silence, until she settled for lying down until breakfast was ready. The bed was extremely comfortable and up till now she hadn't noticed how tired she was. She felt the bed dip and he moved to lie down too and shift closer to her. She let out a silent sigh and slipped into sleep as her mind rejoiced her escape.


	3. Rude Awakenings and Daring Duels

**A/N **

**The third chapter in my story, hope you like it! **

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**Have fun kiddo's!  
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**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. **

**I would tell everyone Fred, Sirius, Remus, Snape and many many others did not die, but were pretending.  
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**Oh what I would do if I did own Harry Potter...  
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For a while, Draco sat there thinking. He had a girl in his bed. _Oh sweet Merlin, there's a girl...in _my_ bed! Get a grip Draco, she's a friend. _He shook his head and tried to clear his thoughts. He stared about his room, trying to distract himself from looking at the sleeping form beside him. He debated about going to talk to Dinker, or packing his school trunk. It was a week until start of term. _Eh food wouldn't be bad._ So he slowly shifted away from the sleeping girl in his bed and got to his feet. He lifted his wand and his copy of Advanced Potion Making from his bedside table and walked to the door carefully as not to trip over his own feet and wake his friend. He slipped from the room and when his feet hit the cold marble floor outside his room he gave an involuntary shiver. He missed his warm bed but food was oh so tempting, along with some nice fireside reading.

His feet were beginning to get seriously cold when he finally got to the bottom of the stairs. He turned towards the dining room and walked through the dark varnished door at the back of the room. There was a huge silver work table in the centre of the room, appliances were strewn across each inch of it, and a large fridge sat in the left corner. The house elf, Dinker was bustling about pressing buttons on random pieces of equipment and snapping her fingers to make ingredients mix together. Dim little balls of light were floating round the room, orbiting a larger and brighter sphere in the middle above the table. Dinker had not recognised his entrance so he cleared his throat, then he realised how much of a snob he sounded. Her little head whipped up and she plastered a bright smile onto her wrinkled face.

"Master Draco, you is awake early. Is you okay?" Draco always pretended to hate house elves and lesser beings, because that's what his father had raised him to be like, but thankfully his caring mother and godfather, taught him that his father was a prat and should not be listened to. Draco had devised a cunning plan to save his ass and still have his say. He would pretend to be like his father so he would be proud, but be his real self when it was safe, such as now. Draco smiled at his thoughts and the little elf.

"Yes Dinker, I'm very well, thank you. I suppose you know Deserae is paying a visit. Could we have some breakfast please?" He liked Dinker; she was very kind and always understood when to get away from father and his anger. The little elf bobbed her head ecstatically, her ears flopping.

"Miss Jones asked for breakfast to be put on, before she goes to wake you. I do hope she is being okay. Does Master Draco want the fire on? I will happily light the fire for Master Draco!" the only problem with house elves, they live to please but end up rambling on. He found it funny and he decided to help the poor thing out, instead of letting it ramble.

"If it's okay Dinker I would love the fire lit, and could you tell me when breakfast is ready? I'll take it up to Dezzy. She's alright I guess, just another one of those nights," He paused to think before continuing, "I have a feeling she will be staying here till we go back to school too." He smiled wider at this, a whole week with his best friend. The little elf bobbed her head again and dissaparated with a small pop to light the fire. In seconds she was back and telling him to go take his seat and relax.

So he settled down in his seat beside the fire, and opened his Potions book. His godfather Severus had inspired his love for the fine art, and even though he was only beginning his third year, he had already learned all the potions in their level books and had moved on to learning something more challenging.

After reading through half of the book, he was interrupted by Dinker to tell him breakfast was now ready. So grudgingly, he got up from his warm seat by the blazing fire to take the tray of breakfast up to his friend. He trudged up the marble stairs, tray in hand and used his foot to prod the door open quietly. He set the food tray onto the bedside table beside her sleeping form and then thought of a way to extract revenge for the rude awakening he got this morning. He smirked mischievously before swaggering round to the other side of the bed and grabbing the glass of water that still sat on his side table. Now he was grinning like a madman as he slunk back to her, and tipped the water onto her face. He then pulled his wand from his pocket and held it out ready to deflect any curse or jinx he was likely going to receive after that stunt.

And as expected, when the water hit Deserae's face, she was up, wand out and all ready for a duel. _Of course I can't do magic outside Hogwarts but with Draco's family being pureblood, and the Ministry being pro-pureblood; they stupidly overlook any magic done around or by purebloods. _She thought spitefully as she took a defensive stance and got ready to kick Draco's ass. When Draco noticed the mischievous glint in her eye, he knew he was in for it and before he could react, she was casting her spell at him.

"_Colloshoo!"_ she smirked as his feet stuck to the ground and he flailed about trying to get his balance again. While she was smirking she didn't think to get another spell ready in her head and was left distracted as Draco got his balance and cast a spell back at her.

"_Expelliarmus!" _He said while trying to keep his balance, lucky for him she wasn't able to deflect it in time and her wand flew from her hand, into Draco's flapping one. It was Draco's turn to smirk as she glowered at him. _If looks could kill there would be no need for the Killing Curse, _he thought. As he entertained himself with the ruthless jinxes and hexes he could cast while she wouldn't attack him back.

Deserae saw his plans in his eyes and quickly remembered she was taught to do wandless magic by her mother before she was able to go to Hogwarts. _Ah ha! He won't be expecting this._ She thought smugly. She raised her hand and cast the spell she'd read in a book last year. _Levicorpus!_ In a flash Draco was up in the air, dangling by his ankle, with scowl gracing his handsome face. She saw his resolve to win this mini duel fading, and he let out a frustrated sigh.

"Let me down Dezzy and I'll announce you the winner, also that I'm a sissy; agreed?" he gave her a heart warming smile, and his eyes twinkled, secretly conveying his desire for revenge, even if they were to make a truce. Deserae still nodded and thought the counter spell. _Liberacorpus!_ And he came crashing down onto his ass. She smiled and then held her hand out to help him up. He took her hand and her heart jolted, it was the first physical contact they'd had in months, since their last hug goodbye at the end of school. Before she could change her mind she tugged his hand and they clashed together in a hug, his body feeling more muscular than a few months ago. Draco slightly blushed at the sudden contact but didn't object, and enclosed her in his arms, smiling to himself.

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**A/N**

**Okie dokie folks! Third chapter up!  
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**By now, you get the jist of these after author notes, well reminder madoofers.  
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**REVIEW.  
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**And make me way too happy to be sane.  
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**Byesey Bye :)  
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	4. Different Than Before

So they stood there, hugging, for what seemed like too long for just friends. They both realised this and let go, blushing. Draco broke the silence that had enclosed the room for minutes.

"Dinker made breakfast, it's over there." He said gesturing to the tray of food. Deserae looked to the plate of egg, bacon, sausages and buttered toast like a starved animal. _Yum! My favourite!_ She thought ravenously. She literally skipped to the bed to sit down and pull the tray onto her lap.

As Deserae began eating, Draco stood in the same spot, in a kind of trance. He missed hugging her, but that wasn't like any hug before. They had grown up a lot over summer, and Draco had started to grow into his muscular form, as well as working out to impress the ladies in Slytherin house.

Deserae on the other hand, had barely grown an inch, unlike Draco who had grown at least four inches, and now towered over her. She was coming into her curves and even though the shirt should have looked horrible on her, the dull blue made her eyes stand out, it made the blue orbs look brighter and if possible, more beautiful than before. Her dark wavy hair had also changed, last year it would have been either an untameable and curly mess, or completely straight. Now it seemed to have calmed down and settled with soft cascading waves that framed her heart shaped face and flowed past her elbows. He had to admit; she looked more grown up, and beautiful. _How is she not a pureblood? Not like blood status matters anyway..._ He mentally argued with himself, continually reminding himself that she was just a friend until she had finished the plate of food.

"Thanks Dray. What do we do now?" She smiled as she asked this, knowing too well what he wanted to do, but wouldn't while she was here. And that was to be a nerd and read his Potions books. She wouldn't mind a little quiet reading time, she still read here old school books, just so she knew how to do everything perfectly, but she desperately missed having new books to challenge herself with. _We could go to Diagon Alley and get our new school books. _She had received her letter the week before, much to her Uncles displeasure at the owl flying through the window and straight above his unusually square head. As if reading her thoughts Draco decided a shopping trip would be nice, after a relaxing bath of course.

"Diagon Alley I suppose, we have the new list of stuff now, and I'll go grab something to eat while you get washed. You know where the bathroom is, I assume?" He finished with a smirk, knowing very well she knew where everything in this house was, being a regular guest to it and all. So he nodded to her, leaving no room for discussion and walked back down the cold marble staircase into the kitchen again. Dinker seemed very surprised at being visited twice in such a short space of time but made no comment about it.

"Dinker, would you be so kind to make me a cup of coffee, two sugars, with milk and some toast please?" He smiled warmly at the sweet little elf as she nodded like a bobble head toy. He stood waiting for mere minutes when she returned, levitating a tray with his coffee and toast behind her. She told him again to take a seat by the fire and she followed him out to living room. Once he was seated she handed him the coffee cup and plate of toast then left him with a soft pop. He ate and waited for a while before thinking enough time had passed to check on Deserae.

As Draco left the room with grace, Deserae set the tray back onto the table and got to her feet. It had been a while since she was last here but Draco was right, she knew her way round this house blindfolded. She walked from the room- her wand in her hand, as you could never be too careful in anyone's house- through a door, two from Draco's bedroom and into a large white tiled bathroom. A large built in bath was set in the middle of the immaculate room, and a white toilet was to the right of the circular bath, and a large marble vanity, oval mirror and sink across the room from the toilet. She turned on the silver taps and let the water run for a few moments before crossing over to the vanity and opening the drawer, where she set her wand down.

There were bath salts and crystals, in a range of colours and smells and bubble baths, also in a range of colours and smells, but had labels saying strange things like dreamless sleep bubble bath, or wide eye awaking bath foam. _They must be potion bubble baths, how convenient. _She looked through many of the light pink and purple ones, reading each supposed smell, finally deciding on one called 'Juiced Berry' that smelled like strawberries, raspberries, cherries and a hint of vanilla. It was light pink with flecks of red and something glittery, and she turned back to the bath that was now nearly filled. She opened the lid and poured the light pink bubble bath in and watched it change the clear water the same colour, along with random flecks of red and bunches of glitter that slowly dispersed and soon mixed with the tinged pink water.

She quickly took of her top, toed out of her black vans, hopped out of her faded blue denim jeans and wriggled out of her flimsy undergarments. She lowered herself into the hot, but not unpleasant, pink water and realised how large the tub actually was. She could swim about if she wanted, and there was a raised part, obviously made for sitting on. She waded over to the smell platform, sat down, letting the warm water untangle any wound up muscles. She was rather relaxed when she remembered Draco would be waiting on her, so she ducked below the surface and roughly raked her fingers through her tangled hair and pulled it this way and that, trying to get it untangled until she ran out of air. She rose to the surface and took a deep breath then rang her hair out as she sat back on the platform.

Believing her hair to be thoroughly washed, she grudgingly got out of the water and walked, soaking wet, back to the vanity, where she picked up her wand. She cast a quick drying charm on herself, and slightly drying her hair before she walked over to her pile of clothes and got redressed. She tapped the empty tub button beside the taps and left the steamy room to get into her clean clothes that lay in her trunk in Draco's room.

When she walked through the door he was waiting for her, sitting reading his Advanced Potions book, she rolled her eyes. He didn't notice her come in so she closed the door with a bit more force to get his attention. His eyes snapped up and he strangely blushed.

"Uh Dray I know it's your room and everything but I need to change. Also it would be brilliant if you wore muggle clothes so I didn't feel like a prat." She said it as a joke but she really didn't want to get weird looks in Diagon Alley if she was wearing muggle stuff. Draco just nodded but made no move to get up and continued reading.

"Fine then; I'm getting changed if you're here or not." She was calling his bluff, knowing he wouldn't dare stay and watch her get undressed. She walked to her trunk that lay in the corner of his room, where she abandoned it last night, this morning, whatever, in her haste to rudely wake up Draco. She lifted the lid and picked out another dull blue baggy shirt, dark ripped jeans and clean underwear. She turned and raised a delicate eyebrow at him, doubting he'd stick around much longer. She huffed and walked to the side of the bed she went to sleep on and set down her clothes.

"Dray, seriously, are you leaving or what?" He heard her say, but all that would make sense in his head was that she was going to undress in front of him. _Don't be disgusting you perv. You are her _friend_, nothing more! _He shook himself mentally before nodding to her again, and slowly getting to his feet.

"I'll go get ready then. Wait for me downstairs." He crossed to a chest of drawers beside another dark wooden door, taking out a white v neck shirt and then opened the door and walking into the darkness, before reappearing with a pair of black jeans that looked seriously expensive. Without another word he left the room so she could get ready.

_That was weird. Did he think I was flirting with him? Maybe that's why he was so quiet... _Her thoughts continued pointing out his oddness today, while she got ready and put her shoes on. With her wand in her hand again, she walked downstairs and sat down in the fireside seat, still thinking.

When Draco came down the stairs, with a black cardigan in his hand and wand in back pocket, he noticed her sitting in his seat. He shrugged and noted it was a really comfortable chair after all. He cleared his throat and woke her from her thoughts, looking like a deer caught in headlights. _She looks adorable..._ he thought before shaking his head for the millionth time to clear his thoughts.

"Ready to go, Dezzy?" He smiled at her before holding out his arm for her to take. She nodded, stood and took his offered arm. He called for Dinker and told the elf to tell his parents that Deserae had come this morning and they were going shopping, also for them not to worry about them. The latter was an afterthought for his poor mother and her over protectiveness.

"Gringotts first, my lady?" He gave her a charming smile and she looked into his silver eyes, not stopping herself from smiling back at him. They took Floo Powder from a nearby jar and together shouted Diagon Alley, as they were whisked away in green flames.


	5. Protected for the Unexpected

**A/N **

**Here we go! Fifth Chapter!  
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**Read and give us some feedback!  
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**Disclaimer: Again I don't own this amazing world, it belongs to Our Queen Jo!**

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When they stepped from the green flames, they were in the Leaky Cauldron. Draco knew she didn't like Floo travel very much, so he held her steady until her head stopped spinning and then smiled at her. He moved his arm so he could take her hand, so he wouldn't lose her in the sea of people, and lead her out into the street, bustling with people. They smiled at each other before heading to Gringotts to take money from their accounts. Soon instead of people, they were surrounded by goblins, not much bigger than a tall house elf, but a lot more volatile and not as friendly, except to very rich customers, like the Malfoy's.

"Ah, Mr Malfoy, how nice to see you. Looking to withdraw money from the account? Wonderful; Ragnok take our young Mr Malfoy here to his vault!" The goblin had an ugly sneer on his face and his teeth were visible, slightly scaring Deserae. As if noticing her discomfort, Draco quickly followed the goblin that was told to take them to his Vault. After many twists and turns on the underground railway system, they were a long way from the surface when they reached the vault. Draco was elated, he loved the railway, and thought it was always exciting, where as Deserae had a tinge of green on her pale skin. Draco rubbed her back with one hand and took her soft hand in the other. When she felt better they continued to the Vault door and then through to the Galleon, Sickles and Knuts, after many hand movements from the assigned goblin.

Draco took out a purse like bag, and he told her it had an extension charm on it, thanks to his lovely mother, as he placed large amounts of gold and silver coins into it, along with a few bronze Knuts. He didn't take enough to make a dent in the huge pile of money that seemed to cover every available space in the Vault but he still took more than the average school kid needed. _He's a Malfoy, not some average kid._ She thought humourlessly, thinking of her own Vault, and slowly dwindling funds of her late parents. The goblin took them to her Vault after they finished in Draco's. It was much nearer the surface, and even though she was quite well off, she still felt poor compared to Draco. She lifted out her own bag and placed around seventy Galleons, about four handfuls of Sickles and 30 Knuts to pay for her _Daily Prophet _subscription. She smiled at him as they left her Vault and travelled back to the surface. She took his hand, and together they walked from the goblin infested bank and into the crowded street.

"Leave the books for last; I would like some new clothes and robes." Draco agreed, not really caring what they did first. He took her to his mother's favourite clothes shop, Twilfit and Tattings. She looked around her at all the rows of clothes in a range of colours, patterns and lengths. She smiled and then went straight to the server and asked to see all the blue shirts in her size. _Blue, of course Deserae would pick blue. It does suit her beautifully though..._ Draco thought to himself. He followed Deserae and the employee to a large rack of, well, blue. That's what it looked like. He watched her pick up about six different style blue tops, then get whisked away to try them on. He once again followed, hoping to give his opinion, which secretly, Deserae wanted too.

She came out with the first top on, it was baggy like her ones at his house, but it had more style to it, the neck was low and the sleeves were short, and it tightened gracefully around her hips. _No one else would be able to put this off. _He thought rather proudly. She did a twirl and gave him a heart stopping smile, as if daring him to say something bad about it, which of course, he had no intension of doing.

"It's stunning, really suits you." He flashed her a wide smile back as she turned on the spot and walked into the changing room to change again. _We're going to be here forever!_ He may have thought this exasperatedly but actually he was enjoying himself, not that he would tell Deserae. Soon she was back out, in a royal blue tank top, with a fitted waist; again it was beautiful on her, and he told her so. This cycle repeated, a daring smile, challenged with a compliment and stunned with a lopsided grin. Within half an hour, they had decided on getting the tops and were now looking at skirts and more jeans. Draco was helping look because of his rather camp fashion taste, it was times like these when she was grateful for his mothers' part in his upbringing. He held a black body con skirt out to her, to which she nodded and took it from him, and added it to the steadily growing heap of clothes. She skipped to the changing room to try everything on; only coming out with things she didn't think suited her, or didn't look good. Draco quickly dismissed any doubts that she didn't look amazing, and he was really proud of himself for choosing these clothes for her. All the skirts, shirts and jeans were bought and they were downtrodden with bags once they left. _How we're going to get all this home I don't know. Oh Dinker! _Draco felt really proud of himself now, with finding a new way of getting things home.

"Dinker." He said clearly and seconds later, after a soft pop, she was standing in front of them, head tilted sideways like a confused dog.

"Dinker, would you be so kind as to take these back home to my room? We aren't done shopping and Dezzy got kind of carried away in the clothes shop." He laughed quietly, implying it was a joke and Deserae laughed with him, much to the little elf's confusion.

"Yes Master Draco, Dinker be happy to help Master Draco and Miss Jones." The elf took the bags from them with a wide smile, and was gone again with a pop.

"To Flourish and Blotts!" Deserae hollered with laugher as their bags were whisked away. She tugged on Draco's arm, and they made their way to the bookshop. They pushed past some rather rude people that didn't seem to want to move, until they finally found themselves in a corner of the overflowing shop.

"Wow, really busy today. Oh brilliant, we're close to the Advanced Magic section, quick before people decide to squish us again." Deserae again pulled on his arm and pulled them into deeper dusty shadows, with towering cases of books on either side of them. She turned from him and started lifting down leather backed books with titles like _Extreme Incantations_, _Confronting the Faceless _and_ The Dark Arts Outsmarted. _Why she was even thinking of getting such advanced books was beyond Draco but Deserae knew the exact purpose for all these books. Her parents had instilled a perfectly clear message to this very day. Be protected for the unexpected; with horrid Slytherbints to deal with again, she was hoping to find some useful pranking and revenge spells.

After Pansy Pug-faced Parkinson's comments last year about Deserae being foul and whatnot, _the little skank deserved everything she was going to get_, Deserae thought with a nasty sneer on her face. Deserae took another look at the shelves before dragging a dazed Draco to another part of the shop, to get their school books for this year.

"Dezzy, go have a better look for advanced books for us to read on with, I'll get the books." He smiled reassuringly at her. He knew she was getting these books for a different reason than being ahead of everyone, no matter what she would tell him. She nodded, squeezed his hand and headed back to the Advanced Magic section to have a better look for books. When she reached the dusty stacks, she began scanning with vigour; _be protected for the unexpected_ was running through her mind, knowing that if it wasn't going to be horrible Pansy trying to kill her, and steal her best friend, it would people with grudges. She wasn't a child anymore and people wouldn't hesitate to harm her.

Her fingers raked over the dusty shelves as she searched for something suitable to learn. She stopped when she reached a book called _Wandless Magic: Duelling the Dark Arts _by Lux Bellator. _Strange name; sounds Latin. _She thought, she was intrigued, as she grew up learning small wandless spells she was ready to jump at learning more, and perfecting a unique talent. Her mother constantly reminded her that only very powerful witches and wizards could control their inner magic without a wand, and taught her to meditate properly so she could control her emotions. She lifted the heavy hard backed book from the shelf and wobbled slightly, trying to get a good grip on the book and not fall over with the weight of it. _Feather-weight charm! _ She thought desperately, she pulled her wand from her back pocket and cast the charm; feeling the weight reduce dramatically, she relaxed. _I think this is good enough. I could always get more in the Library._ She walked back to the Student's section where Draco was patiently waiting on her, bag of books in each hand.

"Dezzy dearest, some dunderhead decided to put Monster books on the list! What in god's name where they thinking? We'll come back with Father and get them; he'd enjoy a good laugh at the stupid things." Draco said this as a joke, but Deserae's crystal blue eyes darkened, seeing Draco's dad's influence on him. He tried to give her a reassuring smile, but it came out a grimace, realised how she must have heard him. He decided to quick make amends. "Ignore me Deserae, I'm just hungry, I suppose." His eyes flickered from hers to jitter around the room. "Ice cream after we get those books? We should practice when we get home, or if you want to work alone that's okay too, I could practice some Potions, s'up to you..." he finished his babbling mumbling, but she heard him.

He was just hungry, and tired. She did wake him up at an unreasonable hour. _He thinks he's done something wrong. Oh Merlin, he needs to relax. I'm not going to eat him!_ And thus began her inner babble, of how she was to blame and he was a lovely kind boy, man, thing...

Absentmindedly she paid for her books, while earning a raised eyebrow and concerned look from the store owner, before she smiled at him and he relaxed. They left the now empty book store and headed to Florean Fortescue's to get ice creams. Draco told her to sit down and he set the books on the spare chair at their small table before returning with a chocolate coconut ice cream for Deserae and a cherry topped sundae for himself. They ate mostly in silence, still dwelling on Draco's statement from before. It was Deserae who finally broke the tension after she finished her ice cream.

"I wanted to go to Scribbulus's and get some different coloured ink and stuff. It'll make passing notes nicer to read." She laughed, it may have been forced but she knew that if they were to eradicate Lucius's influence on Draco, Deserae would be a key part in it. He nodded and finished his ice cream, picking up the bags and leading her out onto the cobbled street again and turning to go into the nearby shop. Deserae was easily amused and picked up a few glittery ink's, and one that changed colour depending on what you ask it to be, of course you had to buy a fancy swan feathered quill but it was really lovely. Even Draco agreed! She bought plenty of the glitter and colour changing ink, and some more pots of black boring ink. They soon decided they'd shopped enough and headed home through the green flames, money bags much emptier than before.

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**A/N**

**Hope you liked it!  
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**REVIEW reminder.  
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**Padfoot  
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	6. Compulsive Prankster

The day flew in when they returned to Malfoy Manor. Draco and Deserae spent the majority of the time before lunch sorting out everything and setting aside books they would amuse themselves through the week, and Draco set up his cauldron to practice some of the new textbooks' potions.

Draco and Deserae had to be dragged by Dinker to have their lunch, because having slight compulsive disorder; every new book had to be set into neat, small to large piles. The clothes had to be folded perfectly, and ordered by light to dark, then immaculately stacked into the trunks. The house elf gave them an eye twinkling smile, while screaming that it was her job to sort everything, although being proud of her masters for being so efficient.

The teenagers went back to Draco's room after lunch and while Draco began preparing his cauldron and ingredients to make the potion, Deserae opened her new advanced books and scanned the new spells. She saw one that really caught her attention, and she smiled maliciously. Unfortunately, Draco was watching avidly, becoming amused and slightly scared at the spark in her eye and the twisted sneer on the girls pale, freckle free face.

"Dez, what is going on in your head? You look like you just dreamed Potter finally died. Oh what a brilliant thought..." Draco had hated Potter since the second he refused his friendship. Deserae thought he had hurt feelings but he very obviously denied this.

"Oh Draco Dearest..." Deserae called in a dreamy sing song voice that told Draco deep down, that he should get far, far away from this mad woman. Somehow, for some unknown, incomprehensible reason, he didn't want to go anywhere. He got very nervous when she used that voice, but her being with him to carry out completely insane things like flying through the house on broomsticks, or dying all the Gryffindor's robes pink, made everything okay. _How strange..._ he mused, still nervous.

"Yes my darling Deserae?" He tried not to sound too eager for what was about to happen, but he couldn't help it, plus he loved when they called each other pet names. _It's a friend thing. _He told himself sternly.

"We're going to play a trick on ol' Lucy, haven't seen him yet. Today will certainly be... interesting..." She had that evil smirk on her face again, and not only did it frighten him, it made him curious. Lucy was her nickname for his father, and she obviously planned to prank him. _Definitely going to be interesting... _

"Do go on my most cunning, conniving friend?" He copied her evil smirk, with a twinkle rival to Dumbledore's in his steely grey eyes.

"First my dear, we must practice, for no plan can go perfectly if one makes a mistake. Simply concentrate on, say your Potion book, and say _Accio Potion book._ While of course, holding out your hand to catch it. Unless you want smacked in the face with it, which I wouldn't mind seeing." She finished the instructions with a laugh and a distant look in her eye, imaging the sight.

So Draco followed her advice, holding out his hand and wand, and clearly saying, "_Accio Potions book." _ And flying through the air was his Advanced Potions book, from the trunk beside the wall.

"Marvellous... Simple... Yet truly genius!" She was giddy with excitement, Draco was just afraid now, nothing could go well. Deserae followed her own instructions and called for her beaded bag that she had emptied into her trunk after their shopping trip.

"Draco, we're going to have some fun. You will hold the bag, I'll get the socks." And with that Deserae handed him the bag and left the room, leaving the door wide open. He stared after her, confused and afraid as hell. _Oh yes no good could come from Deserae and her pranks_. He heard her say _Accio _and something after, he couldn't quite catch it, but he soon understood when random, mismatched socks flew at him through the door. He levitated all the random socks into the expansive bag, with brows knitted together from confusion. Seconds after finishing with all the socks, Deserae practically danced back in, grinning like a Cheshire cat.

"And that is how you confuse two Malfoy's." She snickered, but then burst into tale about seeing the Summoning Charmin her advanced book, created a prank and decided to leave a little note.

"Now we wait and see the wonderful reaction." She sneered again, but Draco did as well, no longer afraid. It took about 15 minutes of patiently waiting before they got the desired reaction.

"NARCISSA! I'M GOING TO KILL THAT BLASTED ELF! DOBBY WAS HERE AND HE STOLE ONE OF EACH PAIR OF SOCKS I OWN! LOOK AT THIS BLOODY NOTE THE LITTLE NERMIN LEFT!" Lucy was completely off his rails, while Draco and Deserae sat with tears in their eyes from laughing themselves silly. After a while, they calmed down and grinned at each other. Deciding it was safer to stay in Draco's room as much as possible to fake innocence, they went back to reading and silently snickering every few seconds. Only Dobby, Lucy, Draco, Potter and Deserae knew why Dobby would annoy ol' Lucius so much. Potter had freed him a few months before end of term, and of course Goldie Locks was mad.

The week past much the same as after lunch that day, reading and trying new spells and potions from their school books, showering, eating, and trying their very hardest not to prank again. Well Draco could safely say he hadn't planned the pranks, but he did now and again take part, otherwise, everything was left to Deserae. And man did she pull pranks. She charmed the neighbour's lawn to burst into fire, cast the _Jelly-Legs_ curse on their cat and went to Diagon Alley to order a hundred owls to swoop through every open window in the street, each leaving droppings and dungbombs as they went.

For Deserae, this was practice.


	7. Mother Daughter Moments

**A/N **

**Here we go! Seventh Chapter!  
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**It's a bit of a filler, but I'll make up for it by adding the next chapter tonight too!  
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**Unforunately my Beta Best Friend is studying for our continued O.W.L's tomorrow.  
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**No joke it's hell.  
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**But I've checked them so hopefully they're alright!  
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**Why don't you review and tell me whatcha think? :D  
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Finally on August 31st, while checking they had everything packed perfectly; books stacked neatly with Cushioning Charms helpfully put on my Dinker; clothes folded and also charmed, and tucking away sweets graciously given by Narcissa, were Draco and Deserae told the news. Sirius Black had escaped Azkaban and was apparently on the hunt for Harry Potter.

Well that's what everyone was saying and Draco hoped with all his heart that Sirius Black, his second cousin, would find Potter and finally do him in. Draco's thoughts were clouded of fantastic ways to terrorise the Boy-Who-Lived. While Deserae felt slightly sorry for the poor boy. Everyone knew that Sirius Black was Harry's Parents betrayer, and he must've been afraid he was now after him as well. She had never held much respect for apparent house rivalry, she did what she wanted, talked with who she wanted and no one, not even the lowest Slytherin, or the nosiest Gryffindor would deter her from doing exactly that. But not only did she feel sorry for Potter, she also felt the need to talk to him, and see if he was okay. This was certainly new. Even though she was not a fan of house hate, she was not friends per se, with the Boy Wonder.

She tried to keep acquaintances, as Narcissa called them. They sometimes could become better friends, or people to have on hand in certain...situations. Deserae learned to listen to Narcissa, because she was fast becoming a second mother, as she taught Deserae all about being a perfect pure-blood girl and hexing people gracefully. She knew Narcissa was only able to have one child, Draco, and that she would have loved a little girl, so Deserae happily stepped into that role, gaining a mother; while Narcissa gained a daughter and even signed her Hogsmeade permission form, acting as Guardian.

They were also told by Goldie Locks, that Dementors would be present at every entrance to the grounds. He advised them to keep chocolate on hand to remedy the effect of the disgusting beings. Whereas Narcissa took them aside after and told them to try and master the Patronus Charm; she said it was a force field of positive energy that kept the Dementors at bay. She also said that most full grown wizards could not do this particular charm, but seeing as they were both from long pure-blood lines, they were much better than average wizards.

That night, as they shared the bed as always, neither of them spoke. Neither of them slept either. They were both too wrapped in thoughts to sleep or even attempt talking. Draco's mind was a mixture of glee that Potter could die, finally; and anger that Potter wouldn't bloody die yet; and more glee, at the thought of taunting the quiet reserved Boy-Who-Lived. Deserae's was catch between worry and fear; she might be targeted by Dementors she'd read that they loved people with dark pasts, and Deserae certainly had that. She was also worried not for herself, but for Potter. He was going to be in for hell when he realises who Sirius was. Finally they fell into a restless sleep, dreaming of hooded figures and a dead Potter.

* * *

When they woke up in the morning, by Dinker, they began to get ready as pure-bloods would; showering in the most divine smells, and preening their hairs to sit perfectly and robes to flatter their changing bodies. Deserae even went as far to go _make up_ _and_ _bra _shopping with Narcissa. According to her adopted mother, young lady's had to look the part. And look the part she intended to, and she pulled it off marvellously, even Draco noticed the subtle hint of mascara, blush and lip tint she used.

As they left the house, Narcissa was leading with Goldie Locks, Draco and Deserae walking gracefully noses to the air and up the back, Dinker levitating the trunks, they were looked at. It was a perfect pure-blood family. A finely dressed father, cleanly shaved, head held high; a beautiful, flatteringly robed woman on her husbands' arm; presentable and well behaved, handsome and stunning children. Deserae was not their actual daughter but she had similarities to Narcissa, like her lip shape, and delicate cheek bones. No one noticed the difference between Deserae and the trio though. They were still in awe at how gracefully and purposefully they walked, as if they owned the very ground everyone stood on. They didn't sneer or look down on everyone, as they moved through the station to wait on the 11 o'clock train. They simply held perfect indifferent masks, moving together like a real family.

When it came to leaving, Narcissa hugged Draco then shooed him over to shake his father's hand like a man; then enclosed Deserae in a motherly hug, conveying so many emotions, much like the ones Deserae felt last night and still slightly had. She spoke, for the first time since leaving the Manor.

"Do be safe, Dezzy. I consider you my own daughter now, and you will forever be welcome in our home. Plus I need you to keep an eye on my Dragon, he is a bit rambunctious. Owl me if you need anything dear, do not hesitate, alright?" She smiled warmly at Deserae, showing she really did care, not just about Draco but about her too. Deserae smiled and nodded at her, then composed her 'pure-blood mask' as she called it. She then took hold of her hand and walked her to the carriage door, where Draco had already disappeared through to get them a carriage as planned this morning.

"We'll be home for Christmas... Mother," She tested the word before deeming it safe to say, it actually sounded nice, "and of course, I'll update you on him and try my best." Nodding goodbye to Goldie Locks then being pulled into a last hug from Narcissa, she backed onto the train and set off to find Draco for the long train journey.

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**A/N**

**Hope you liked the awkward girly shopping and stuff with Cissy, couldn't help myself.  
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**Plus the poor girl needs a woman in her life!  
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**Okay review please :D  
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**Bye bye  
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	8. Revelations

**A/N**

**Like I promised, the next chapter!  
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**Please leave me some feedback or I will get sad :c  
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**So enjoy!**

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When Deserae found Draco, he had got one of the more classy compartments for the journey. The usually grimy and worn seats were plush and looked brand new with the soft brown material, not quite fur but comfy none the less. The usually litter covered floor was fine dark wood and was so polished you could see yourself in the reflection. This was certainly reserved by Lucykins. _Aw how thoughtful? S_he thought sarcastically. After staring around in shock she moved to sit beside Draco, as she watched him look out the window, she realised he was being too quiet.

"Hey Dray, in here's better than last year's." She looked to him, hoping to get some reaction, a declaration of how rubbish Potter was, how rubbish the school was, anything! She then countered his noiselessness with her concern. "Something wrong Dray?"

Draco just shook his head and continued to stare, with those usually shining silver eyes dulled to a deep grey. Deserae was confused.

Draco didn't know what was wrong with him, honestly. He just felt shy and awkward around Dezzy now and he couldn't fully explain why without either freaking his friend out or making her hate him. After seeing the dramatic change from careless runaway in often ripped denim jeans, dull baggy tops and no apparent care for her appearance, the young lady that sat beside him was a huge shock; but not a bad one.

She looked stunning, there were many, many more words to describe it, but with Draco's newfound shyness and lack of coherent thought train, stunning would do. She looked like a proper pure-blood girl, like the ones he used to grow up with before they were shipped off to be married. _I wonder if Father would approve if we got married. _He mused this idea before realising he had basically implied he wanted to marry his best friend! What on earth was he thinking _that_ for?

_Don't be stupid, she's gorgeous! _His mind argued with him. She was in fact gorgeous. Her usually pale, cream cheeks had a flush of pink blush. Her bottomless, sea blue eyes with deep flecks of green to make them sparkle had often made him fall into the endless blue orbs and he had to try and not get too lost in her eyes and creep her out. Her once small, rectangular body shape had matured into an hourglass figure, and her new clothes just made her curves stand out. Her once untameable mane of black curly hair had died down to soft waves that reached her elbows. While her fringe still sometimes flicked into her blue eyes, it seemed cute when she would run her hands through, what he would imagine to be, feather soft hair, to brush away. Sometimes when she was lost in thought she would twirl a piece of her hair round her delicate fingers. It was times like these when he wondered if he would feel how soft her hair actually was.

Thinking back on his nothing but truthful description of his best friend, he could not deny it any longer.

He had a crush on her.

* * *

After taking off from the platform, they pulled out some of their new books from their trunks and began to read, not feeling the need to fill the comfortable silence with pointless blabber. An hour or two later, they were removed from their silent reading by an unmistakable booming voice.

"Hey Malfoy! Jones! Good to see you kiddo; you've grown up!" Blaise Zabini, huge flirt and long time friend of Draco and Deserae's sauntered in, destroying the nice silence and sat himself on the chair opposite the pair. He may have been a great friend, but he sure was a ladies' man. He also had a knack for finding ones that didn't like being dumped, and were particularly good at hexing people. Cue Pug-faced Parkinson, the girl that could out scream a banshee and happily hex everyone into next week. Draco shot Blaise a death glare for allowing the stupid bint to come with him. Blaise just shrugged, meaning the little twit was following him about, much like a lost dog. _Good Merlin he can pick them! _Draco thought mockingly. While Pansy stood there, her and Deserae having a glaring match, Draco spoke up.

"Hello Zabini, what do you want? We were reading." Draco said with impatience and threat filling his short sentence, while narrowing his eyes at him. Zabini paid no attention to emotion behind the question but answered none the less.

"I came to check you were okay. According to this year's Prefects, Dementors will be boarding the train sometime during the ride. Hope you came prepared. See you later." With that he stood, nodding to Dezzy and left, Pug Parkinson trailing behind him. Deserae slowly tensed, figuring out what could happen. _Merlin's saggy ass. _She thought while shaking her head at the possibility.

"Draco, you didn't happen to try the Patronus Charm at all after your mother mentioned it eh?" she tried to sound calm as if she was discussing the weather but she couldn't stop her voice from shaking in fear.

"No, didn't think I would need it. Are you alright?" He had heard her tone and wondered what had made the girl nervous like that, she never got nervous. Ever. She just nodded to him, off in her own world.

"Do you want some food? I'll go find the trolley lady if you want. My treat?" he tried to sound cheerful and also brighten her mood, but with no such luck. She just nodded slightly and didn't seem to know what she was nodding about. He stood and went off to find the old witch that pushed the trolley full of sweets and goodies.

* * *

Deserae was freaking out. No that was an understatement. She was very close to hyperventilating, passing out, having a heart attack; she didn't know, but she was so very worried. She knew Dementors were known to bring back a person's very worst memories, just by being in their presence. _I know what they're going to bring back for me. That can't happen. I need to do something. I wonder if I could produce a Patronus in a few hours. No harm in trying._ And with that thought, she opened her trunk and got out her Advanced Defence book that she'd borrowed from Narcissa when she told them about the charm. Flicking through the pages, she finally got to the section on defence against Dementors. _Great. _She thought sarcastically. A strong, happy memory was needed. _Oh bloody Baron. _Still determined to get some sort of protection from the dark creatures, she raked her brain for something happy. Something that made her feel warm and fuzzy in her stomach, made her feel completely safe while doing something potentially life-threatening, made her feel like a princess while wearing muddy school robes and having some mud on her face. _Or someone..._ her traitorous mind whispered. She finally found something half decent, but strangely, it fit all her requirements. It was the morning she woke Draco up after leaving home. How completely peaceful and sweet he looked, right before she ambushed and tickle-attacked him... His smile after waking up to see her face...his eyes lighting up as they met with hers.

It was right then she kept in mind, as she spoke the charm. A white mist erupted from her wand, and swirled about until it was like a tornado was connected to the tip of her wand. She felt faint, but she kept thinking about Draco's silver eyes, the ones that had shown so much love for her; completely platonic, of course.

She barely heard the person screaming, not sparing a thought if it could be someone calling for her as she blacked out, Draco's shining silver eyes, dancing behind her eyelids.

* * *

**A/N**

**Well Draco finally admitted it! Yay!  
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**Tell me what you think of how he described her and tell me what you think so far!  
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**Okie dokie  
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**Bye!  
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**Padfoot  
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	9. Twist of Fate

**A/N**

**Wow  
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**The Eighth Chapter!  
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**As per usual, Harry Potter does not belong to me.  
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**Have fun reading and please for the love of Dobby's Sock.  
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**Give me some reviews!  
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Draco was on his way back from the trolley, with a bunch of cauldron cakes and pumpkin pasties in his hands. He arrived at their compartment in time to see Deserae's silvery wisps of an unformed Patronus fade and her fall. He threw the food to the chair and burst forward, screaming her name as he caught her limp body in his arms. His mind raced a hundred miles an hour, like stampeding hippogriffs, or even a herd of railed up centaurs. _She's dead... She's dead... Oh good god she's dead... She can't be dead... _his mind raced ahead and in circles. He tried screaming for Blaise, a Prefect, anyone.

And a few seconds later, someone did come; but not who Draco would have preferred. It was Harry Potter, and Blaise was in tow.

"Help her- she's- oh god- Deserae!" He was sobbing like a baby as the boys rushed to lift Deserae onto the soft bench sofa. He was shaking and gasping for air when Blaise turned to him, trying to regain some of his friend's mental stability.

"Draco! Draco you have to listen to me!" He was trying to get Draco's attention but Draco was overwhelmed. His best friend looked dead; so still, her chest barely moving, her face paler than usual. He was sitting beside her head, stroking her forehead, cheeks, and finally brushing away silk soft flicks of black hair from her face, smoothing it down. He was already so broken, but he still managed to bark a heart wrenching sob before hugging her unmoving body.

"Draco! Draco you prat! Listen to me! Malfoy! Ferret face! Ice Princess! Twinkle toes! Bludger brain! For the love of Merlin, Draco Lucius Malfoy; stop being a drama queen and listen you ponce!" Blaise screamed, losing his patience. Draco was still in tears, clutching Deserae when he quietened his sobs, and slowly stopped them, though the tears still ran down from his red rimmed eyes. Blaise took this as a good sign; he now had Draco's attention.

"She'll be fine. She isn't dead." Draco's eyes lit up, and Blaise continued. "She did something to over exert herself. Do you know what?" Draco nodded. Blaise's brow furrowed, "Well then?" he was getting impatient.

"Silly Dezzy... She tried a too advanced spell... from our new books." Draco rasped, his voice was hoarse from screaming and sobbing, he didn't even care if Potter was watching him with a look on his face like he'd seen a ghost.

"Malfoy, just breathe. She'll be out for a while, but try and calm down. It wouldn't be good for her to see you like this." Surprisingly it was Potter that spoke, his voice soft and caring. Draco nodded, and got up from her side. He wiped his eyes and sat down on the couch opposite his friend.

"Thank you both. I was just so scared. Sorry about you having to see that. Guy's shouldn't cry, never mind bloody Malfoy's. What the bloody hell was she thinking?" He said shaking his head, partially in confusion, and regret.

"Eh, she probably just curious about new spells. Well if you two are okay now, I think I'll leave. I'll tell a prefect that she passed out and to send an owl on to Snape. If you need to talk, either come find me or get Blaise to. I'll understand, Ice Prince." Harry- no Potter smirked as he spoke then let himself out after Draco nodded to him.

"I have no words for what just happened. Except this, what's up with you and Potter being friends?" Draco asked Blaise, while giving him a raised eyebrow look.

"Drake, you know me. I'm friends with everyone. He got me when he heard you screaming; he and his mates, and some new professor are in a compartment a few down. Didn't think you'd want your enemy trying to help you with your girl, mate. Don't blame him at all. You probably would have killed him on sight had you been stable." He joked and it calmed Draco down, knowing Blaise. He was friends with everyone; first year to seventh in every house. He was a likable guy, if you knew him at all; you'd want to be best mates. Draco just nodded at him.

"I think I know what she was trying to do, didn't want to say it in front of Potter; even though he wouldn't dare say anything but best not to risk it." Blaise gave him a wry sort of smile. Potter told the Weasel and Granger everything. _Worse than a bloody girl. _

"Well, what was she trying to do, Drake? Kill her frigging self?" Draco paled at the suggestion, and Blaise narrowed his eyes. He had hit a nerve, something wasn't right there. _Maybe she had tried before? Oh gods, Deserae. _Blaise thought, he opened his mouth to apologise, or say something, but couldn't find the words. So he stood opening and closing his mouth, shaking his head and lowering his eyes to his shoes.

"She was trying to cast a Patronus, to fight the Dementors, yanno? She's been through things you can only imagine. Actually, don't try. You wouldn't even come close. Well my mother kind of took her in after we became friends, then at the end of first year; she came to stay with my family for a while. She told me her Uncle hates magic, beats her if she mentions it. Of course he flipped when she got her letter, near killed her. Thankfully, accidental magic healed her right up. She was never okay after that though. There's more, oh so much more. But it's up to her to tell you." Draco shook his head as his mind replayed all the images of her coming in the middle of the night, bruised and bleeding. He never understood how a girl of her age in first year could take it. He still wondered, but thank goodness she realised when to stop talking, what subjects to avoid, and when to run and she nearly always came to Draco's after she did run.

"Merlin... I would never guess... so did she try to... yanno?" Asked Blaise cautiously, he didn't want to ask outright, but he still wanted to know. Draco nodded, and his eyes darkened to a stormy grey. Tears welled up in his eyes, but they never shed. He blinked them away.

"She did, actually. Even before Hogwarts. Before she was even eleven, Blaise. What type of place did she grow up in to want that to happen?" He shook his head, jerking away the memories.

"Is she okay now?" Blaise asked, it was a stupid question, but he didn't know what else to say.

"I dunno, Blaise, sometimes. She's stopped trying since she discovered her magic just saves her. If things get bad she sneaks to mine and stays till school starts again. Mother and Dinker love her; I actually think my Father secretly does too, you know. He'd never admit it but I think he's proud of how she's so happy after everything, that's why her pranks make him smile. I saw him smiling when we flew through the house covering it in baby powder and glitter. Quite the mind that one's got." He smiled proudly at her still body. Blaise just nodded, and stored this information.

"If you want you can go back your compartment or stays till she wakes up? I wouldn't mind the company." Draco suggested, seeing Blaise still standing in the middle of the classy compartment.

"Yanno mate, I think I'll stay here. You have food, a better compartment; better books and the others are boring." He laughed quietly. Draco smiled, agreeing with his logic. _Such a Slytherin. _

"Good, I was wondering perhaps if you knew the Patronus. If Dementors did come I want to protect her. I want to try but I think I'd faint too." Draco started quietly.

"Unfortunately Drake, I don't, but I'll help you learn. Apparently they're coming before we reach Hogsmeade. We're still three hours, at least, from there. Why not try?" Draco again agreed with Blaise's logic.

"Let's do it!" He replied with a slight cheer. If he could help his best friend, then he would. He lifted the fallen book from beside Deserae and flicked to the Patronus Charm section, like Deserae had done. He read the passage and nodded to himself.

"Better start thinking of happy memories. This will take a while." Draco smirked to his surprised friend while he rummaged his brain for a good enough memory.

"Ah ha, that will do. Got yours Blaise? Stop as soon as you feel a little faint. Only try what you can." Blaise nodded at Draco's instructions.

"Out of curiosity, Drake, what are you thinking of?" Blaise smiled, knowing it would be something to do with Deserae.

"Actually, it's of the day Deserae dropped by." He laughed to himself, this had happened many times before, but none like this. "Last week, when she left again, she woke me up. When I saw her face, something clicked- no more like something fell into place- I can't explain it. But I saw her differently than I did before summer and when I looked into her eyes, I imagined a future with her in it. As my girlfriend or something..." He trailed off, blushing profusely.

"Aw Draco that's so cute!" Draco's whole body stiffened, his eyes widened and he suddenly felt very sick at that voice. The overly sweet 'I'm-so-innocent' voice that started pounding through his head. He spun round and was greeted by none other than Miss Pug-face herself. And she had a sneer on her face that Goldie Locks would be proud of. _This can't end well._

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**A/N **_  
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**Hope you liked my imaginative insults to Draco, I enjoyed writing that part, laughed a lot!  
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**Sorry for it being well depressing but it needed to be done!  
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**Also sorry for giving you a cliff hanger. Again.  
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**But if you give me some reviews I'll update again on Saturday!  
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**REVIEW!  
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**Bye Now :P  
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**Padfoot  
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	10. Minxes and Jinxes

**A/N**

**Because I'm an awesome person, I'm uploading this now!  
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**I'm still working on the next chapter so it won't be uploaded until Tuesday maybe  
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**But YoHoHaLoHo! It shall be done!  
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**Ignore my weirdness...  
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**Right, you know the way it goes.  
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**Read.  
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**Review.  
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**Enjoy!  
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"What do you want, Parkinson?" Draco sneered at her. She just tutted and shook her head menacingly.

"Now now Draco, I'm sure you wouldn't want your precious little girl to run away, disgusted when she knows you _looove _her!" she smirked at him and her ugly mud coloured eyes glinted.

"What do you _want?_" He repeated; Parkinson would not blackmail him. He invented blackmail! If she was going to tell Deserae, he'd do it before her just to have the upper hand.

"Well seeing as I conveniently overheard you proclaiming your feelings for your stupid little git, I'd say you watch your attitude. What if daddy found out? What about Aunt _Bella_?" She countered in a sultry, vile whisper. _I don't care if Father finds out, and Aunt Bella is in Azkaban. Stupid bint._

"Why don't you go Avada Kedavra yourself, mutt face? Your petty blackmail attempts bore me. Go stalk someone else." Draco sneered, gaining confidence as the insults flowed freely.

"Oh Draco, wouldn't want Snapey to hear his favourite pupil to say those words! No I think I'll stay right here. It's quite nice." She looked around, her eyes resting on Deserae's still body. "As for petty blackmail, I have no idea what you're talking about. I'm just making conversation. I might let my wand do the talking..." She whispered the latter, and Draco's hand slowly rose to his robe pocket. He could tell Blaise was doing the same. He then realised that she would notice both of them moving so he shifted his hand back to his side. He cocked his head and decided to taunt her, and let Blaise take action. He was better at stunning anyway.

"Oh really, Parkinson? Why would you do that? What would you gain? Indulge me in your backwards ways." He sniggered, knowing he had touched a nerve.

"Dear Draco, seems Daddy didn't teach you any manners. It seems I must." And within seconds her wand was pressed into his neck, daring him to say anything else. But Blaise wasn't far behind her, for she seemed to forget him completely. He came right up behind her and stupefied her. Blaise grinned at him as Pansy dropped to the floor in a heap. Draco leaned down and pocketed her wand. _She'll get this back, when Sev is done with her. Prat. _He thought with an evil glint in his eyes, imagining Severus Snape's reaction.

"I can't wait till Sev hears about this. Let's hex her a bit eh?" Draco joked to his companion, who hastily agreed. They thought for a moment before Bat-Bogey hexing her, and severing part of her hair from her disgusting brown ponytail off. They sniggered to each other before dragging her into the girls' lavatory down the train. No one even looked as they passed, dragging her slumped body. If they did, no one cared.

"Patronus time!" Blaise said as he closed the door on Pansy. They headed back to their compartment and started where they left off.

"Well Blaise, I'm ready, what about you?" Blaise shook his head and motioned him to go first. "Fine then whimp," He joked. He raised his wand, remembering the night he was awoke by Deserae. The memory filled him, his heart swelled, his lungs worked harder to breathe and his stomach got a thousand snitches, especially when he looked to his best friend before saying the spell clearly.

"_Expecto Patronum!" _The same silvery mist spurted from his wand, and became a small whirlwind in seconds but Draco soon started feeling faint, and his eyes darkened before he cut the spell off. "How was that?" He knew he'd done the right thing, by the shocked look on Blaise's face then he rummaged in his trunk for chocolate, while his friend gaped at him.

"Bloody brilliant Drake! Plus you didn't faint, like Des." He grinned and then thought of something himself. He chose the day he got his pup Maximus. He raised his wand like Draco did and thought of how happy he got a doggy, and it too made his heart squeeze but not quite the same way. "_Expecto Patronum!" _He said imitating Draco. He got a small mist, then a dismal miniature tornado from the tip of his wand before it stuttered out, not even exhausting him.

"What the hell was that?" Draco was grinning as he saw his friends' pitiful attempt at a happy memory.

"That dear Blaise was rubbish. Think again while I try." He thought of Deserae again, as he closed his eyes. This time he thought of Deserae threatening to change in front of him. Anything involving Deserae, he knew for sure, would work; but he wanted to see what other memories did too. "_Expecto Patronum!" _The mist reappeared, just the same as the time before. Apparently, anything involving Dezzy did work. The tornado swirled around and around, and Draco could practically imagine Deserae could tell him he was doing amazingly. He cut the spell off again, before his vision could start fading.

He slumped down onto the soft sofa, relaxing as he closed his eyes and when he reopened them, he was extremely shocked to see the one and only, Deserae standing in front of him, with an eyebrow cocked, and hands on hips. _If her hair wasn't splayed out like a puffball she'd look beautiful. Don't lie you twat; she looks hot like that. _His mind was in a daze and apparently having an argument.

"You're...uh...up?" Draco said dumbly. _Of course she's up you idiot. _She smiled at him.

"Yep, don't know what the hell happened, care to explain?" Her brows mashed together and a crease indented her forehead, in his opinion, looking too cute. Her pout was almost irresistible, but bloody Blaise decided to join their conversation.

"Let's just say you were an idiot and Draco had a not so handsome break down, okay?" He helpfully suggested. Deserae looked confused still, but Draco shot him a death glare.

"I'm gonna say okay but hound the details out later, right now, I'm tired. Someone give me chocolate." She said while slumping back onto the plush seat, looking quite defeated as Draco handed her some of their stash of chocolate. "Ah, my sweet weakness. What would I do without you?" She whispered while munching happily piece after piece. Draco couldn't help but wish she was saying that to him and not chocolate.

After she had gained some colour in her pale face, she give Blaise and Draco a look that said 'tell-me-or-suffer' and they were only too happy to agree. You never messed with a chocoholic Slytherin Girl. Ever. Or it would be the last thing you would ever do. Blaise and Draco shared a look, and Draco took that as a hint to start and his friend would carry on.

"Well, uh. You did the Patronus Charm-I'm offended you didn't wait for me by the way- and you kind of tired yourself out, and passed out. Let's just say I was a bit scared." Draco said sheepishly, though trying to lighten the mood by adding a taunt into his explanation.

"He's being modest, Des. He was bawling like a baby, and he thought you died. Potter looked quite afraid of his antics. I always knew he was a poncy drama que- Ow you twat! That- ow stop it!" He was being hit repeatedly by a very flushed Draco, Deserae just smiled. Draco huffed after that, and Blaise thought it was safe to continue.

"Yes well, after you'd gone night-night, I thought up rather ingenious insults to get his attention- I'll tell you later dear- and Pansy just came in and was being a general ass." He gladly left off the part of Draco admitting his feelings for his best friend, and why Pansy was being a prat. It was Draco's job, not his, to tell the girl. "Now, kiddies, I'm going to go and bug other bitches. Wow, I'm a poet." He rose from the seat gracefully, gave Deserae a wink and strolled out the door smirking to himself. _Stupid prick. _Draco laughed silently to himself.

"Do I even want to know, Dray?" He had his head bowed as he laughed, and didn't notice her sitting beside him now. He was honestly surprised how she snuck up on him. _Sneaky minx. _He smirked.

"No, Dezzy, you don't. But I agree, I'm not the best looking crier. And I'm always bloody gorgeous!" He nudged her with his elbow lightly and smiled at her. She nodded and then leaned her head against his shoulder. Instinctively, his arm curled around her shoulder and she snuggled closer to him.

"Des, you know if they do come, Blaise and I know how to cast a decent Patronus; we could keep you safe. They won't get you, I promise." He whispered to her, knowing she was feeling sleepy and relaxed. He felt her nod against his shoulder and he smiled. _Why, oh why? _He thought dejectedly.

"Thank you, Dray. I was scared, earlier yanno? I'm curious..." She whispered back, Draco's interest rose.

"Ask away, my dear." He said lightly. He took a steady breath, preparing himself for something terrible.

"What did you... you know... think about?" She mumbled, and Draco could tell she was embarrassed at what she was thinking when she tried. _Now would be a good time to tell her, before she finds out from Pansy_,He thought.

"Do you want the truthful answer? You'll have to promise me not to laugh," He knew she had no intention of doing so but he might as well add it to the list, "okay?" He felt her nod into his shoulder again. _Now or never._ He thought fearfully.

"I actually thought of the first night, when you woke me up... Something in me felt different than before, but not in a bad way. It was strange definitely, but kind of good too. I only realised when I explained to Blaise what it was that happened when I looked into your eyes. What I'm trying to say is that, I have feelings for you... That was the moment I chose, and I will keep using it." Draco murmured to her, trying not to let his voice shake in fear of being rejected. But it didn't matter.

Because Deserae was asleep, head on Draco's shoulder and she did not hear anything he had just said.

"Bloody hell." That was all Draco could manage before shifting so he could lean against the side of the compartment wall, pulling Deserae close to him and relaxing. He was soon asleep, dreaming of her beautiful blue eyes, and of one day telling her his feelings.

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**A/N**

**Sorry for being evil and not letting her find out but what do you expect?  
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**I'm just mean, I love writing Blaise, I really do.  
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**He's funny and I hope you agree that he is quite awesome too!  
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**Leave me a wee review of your opinion on this so far!  
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**Because this is going to be a really long fan fic!  
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**Also tell your friends too :3  
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**REVIEW3  
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**Bye bye for now!  
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**Padfoot  
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	11. Sweet Dreams

**A/N **

**Well the much awaited chapter of adorableness!  
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**Unfortunately, you aren't allowed the next chapter yet.  
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**Because I haven't even started it and it's going to be very long.  
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**PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE  
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**REVIEW!  
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**I'm sirius, it makes me way too happy whenever people tell me what they think about it!  
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**So tell yo' friends, and get them to read, enjoy and review too!  
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The train ride was peaceful, at least while the pair of teenagers slept. Draco was comforted by having Deserae in his arms, and she was happy at being held; it kept the nightmares at bay. They don't know who woke up first but when they did, they both blushed and searched for a topic to talk about, although they still lay in each others' arms.

"Des, want to try the Patronus again? I'll be here to help this time." Draco suggested eventually, he smiled at his still sleep dazed friend, who nodded in response. "Right, up we get then. Come on, up." He laughed merrily at her disgruntled expression.

"No. Comfy; Stay." She ordered him; it just made him laugh more. He shook his head, also reluctant to get up. He decided someone needed to make them move, and he would be that person.

"Up before I tickle you." He said deviously, narrowing his eyes and tauntingly sneering at her. Deserae's eyes widened and she went to move from their entangled bodies until Draco lunged for her, lightly tickling her slim waist. Draco would later say she hadn't moved fast enough, but honestly, since he'd come to terms with his crush, he was going to great lengths to get as close to his friend as possible. Seeing they were best friends, it wasn't that hard to make excuses if she started asking about it.

Her laughter filled the compartment and it washed through Draco, making his heart swell at how it sounded. Sure the way to make her laugh like that was quite torturous but she was laughing, and boy did he love her laugh. His fingers slowly stopped tickling and she collapsed against him, still giggling occasionally. He smiled and let his hands rest by her side, so they were softly touching her waist but not obviously to her.

"You're evil; Draco Malfoy and you will bloody pay for that!" She chided him and laughed menacingly, Draco's gut twisted and his heart beat slightly faster. Whatever revenge she would take, it would either be painful or embarrassing.

"Oh Merlin's frilly granny bloomers; I'm sorry! I bought you food though! You have to forgive me!" He gave her his best puppy dog eyes and his lower lip protruded slightly pouting. Draco's sad face was beyond sad, it was heart breaking and Draco knew this. He took pride in his sad face, and if it didn't stop her oncoming slaughter, nothing would.

* * *

Her best friend pouted and widened his silvery eyes at her and her heart jumped. It was a very sad face, even though she knew he was kidding around, it slightly upset her. She wouldn't be able to look at that face another moment without crying.

She shook her head at him and stood up, slowly slinking over to the food on the other bench sofa. _The prat got chocolate frogs, how can I _not _forgive him? _She thought to herself. She saw him smile and relax back into the plush seat. She opened the chocolate frog and took a bite of it without hesitation or looking at the card. She sat munching away staring out the window at the rushing scenery, still thinking of the upcoming Dementor visit until a hand touched her knee.

Her head whipped round and her eyes met with Draco's. He was giving her the 'I-know-what-you're-thinking-about' look, a mix of scolding and pity. She smiled lightly and shook her head.

"Let's practice Dray. Or else I'm going to sleep and leaving you and Zabini to deal with the Dementors." She said calmly, though the hint of a joke laced her words. She swallowed the last of the chocolate, and then frowned.

"I'm guessing my wand is somewhere on the ground?" She raised her eyebrow at her blonde friend and then her eyes scanned the ground for her Redwood wand. They finally rested on the thin twisted wood at the corner. She smiled, stood and stooped to pick it up.

* * *

_Get your mind out of the gutter Draco! Don't let her pick _anything _else up. Unless you enjoy perving on your best friend? _His mind whispered and taunted him, and Draco had to shake his head clear. He stood quickly and reached for his wand as well.

"Well, get thinking Blondie!" Deserae smirked at Draco's rather dazed expression, but he mutely nodded. Deserae again thought of the first night with him and his beautiful eyes; she cocked her head and looked into his misty steel grey eyes as Draco searched for his own memory. Once he nodded again she smiled and raised her wand above waist height.

"_Expecto Patronum!" _The pair said together, both smiling at each other as the mist from their wands began the miniature whirlpool and spun in time. Their eyes caught and both could see the spark lying below the surface of the grey and blue irises.

They began to feel faint after a few moments and they cut the spell off then ungracefully flopped onto the bench sofas.

"So... much... effort!" Deserae managed to grumble, before slowly reaching for her beloved chocolate. She passed some to Draco- well more threw it at his face, not really bothering to aim for his mouth- and slumped back onto the comfortable material.

"Well I rather enjoyed it, and I would say our Patronus' are pretty well done. I know we wouldn't have time for a nap but I would enjoy a lie down. God I feel like an old person!" Draco laughed and relaxed into a more comfortable lying position on his couch.

"Mm, yes, a nap wouldn't be bad. If you want you can, I'm going to practice for a while longer. Don't worry mother, I'll break in between to rendezvous with my sweet chocolate and books. Oh I'm reading a great classic right now, it's about this guy- his brother died, and so did his dad- and he's in love with the king's future wife- are you even listening to me, you prat?" Deserae prattled on until she saw Draco's eyes drooping and his breathing slow into an even rhythmic pattern. She shook her head and reached for her fallen book, flicking through the pages, stopping to read some interesting parts.

* * *

Draco fell asleep listening to Deserae's musical voice ramble on about her love of books and chocolate, something he had learned in his first week of knowing her. His dream was simple, he held his beautiful best friend in his arms, and she was looking at him, then looking down at her left hand to a gleaming diamond embedded silver band. This surprised him, but he quite liked the thought of them ending up together.

His dream continued, their entwined bodies surrounded by a shining white light and as they smiled at each other, something seemed to stir within their eyes, and they shone too. Draco's silver eyes reflected the stunning white light like diamonds and Deserae's blue eyes seemed to absorb every ounce of light the room had, and expel it tenfold; showing off the lapis lazuli and topaz flecks within the azurite blue pools. It was the most heart-breaking beautiful sight to Draco. Just them holding each other; engagement ring upon his best friend's finger; her looking so happy to be here, with him, and as always gorgeous. Her hair was splayed over her shoulders and down her sides.

The dream Draco and Deserae moved to the invisible ground, almost like they were floating. They still held each other, but their clutched hands now rested on Deserae's abdomen, cradling her stomach.

Draco didn't get a chance to figure out why they were doing that when he was woke by someone. They were pressing his back up to the backrest of the bench, shifting him onto his side and sliding into his previous space, so he was wrapped over the back of their body. _I knew she wanted to nap, and I'm as cuddly as a teddy bear! Heh! _He thought with a mental smirk, as he pretended to be asleep still.

He carefully shifted his body enough to conspicuously drape his arm over the small girl's waist, almost pulling her to him tighter. He heard a soft moan from her and he couldn't help smile. Again he gently tugged her with his arm from round her waist, pulling her into the embrace more securely. Images of his peaceful dream flitted behind his eyelids, but sleep did not claim him again, and he revelled in having his friend in his arms safely once more.

* * *

Deserae did in fact practice the Patronus Charm, quite a bit more. She felt drained, emotionally, and physically. Her mind couldn't put up with the strain of fading in and out of consciousness every ten minutes, and her body felt like she had ran five miles, forgot to stretch and fell asleep on the rocky ground.

She shook her head, after slumping on the soft seat and stared at her sleeping best friend. His usual haughtiness was eradicated, leaving a peaceful, slight smile on his lips. His pale face showed his almost feminine cheek bones, although his piercing grey eyes refused to be seen as anything like a woman's. Her eyes raked every inch of him. From his tousled platinum blonde hair, that now cascaded his face, flicking into his closed eyes. How badly she wanted to reach out and softly brush it from his beautiful face was ignored and she continued to examine him carefully as she regained some physical strength and comfort.

His pale cheeks were paired with a perfect straight nose, with a little button tip, and pale rose pink lips. They were pouted slightly as he smiled in his sleep, and Deserae wanted to show him how soft her lips were, and she wanted to see if his were soft too. _What are you thinking? He is your friend! You are not supposed to be involved with anyone anyhow. Remember what Narcissa taught you, for the love of Merlin's great granny pants! _She mentally chided herself. Somehow, she couldn't bring herself to care all that much.

She slowly stood from her bench and shrugged out of her outer robe, for she was getting too warm. Underneath the fitted black robes she had worn a trademark blue top, though it had a sweetheart neckline and straps. She rolled her shoulders and stretched her tired muscles.

She slowly moved her exhausted body to his bench and almost shoved him over, as gently as she could, and took his space at the front of the sofa. Draco's arm was lain straight out and she rested her head on it and relaxed into the soft material couch. She felt rather surprised when Draco shifted and his arm was slung over her hip and his hand hovered close to her stomach. She let out a sort of sigh moan, as her body moulded into his and relaxed further, lulling her into a daze. She was rather startled, but did not move from her comfortable position when his arm pulled her closer into him, her back arched into his toned abdomen.

She soon fell asleep, no dreams, no nightmares. Perfectly happy being cradled while she slept in his arms again. She knew she wouldn't have this luxury when in Hogwarts, because of separate dormitories, so she enjoyed it while she could. Though, how she would manage the nightmares once again, she did not know, frankly, she did not care much either.

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**A/N**

**I know it's kind of boring, but it's cute and aw :3  
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**It's also quite repetitive, don't worry that is due to change.  
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**Soon. Very soon...  
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**Hope you're excited for the next chapter.  
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**The Dementor's will finally make an appearance!  
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**And I shall be evil and not update until I get 10 reviews, at the momento I have 6.  
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**So review :D  
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**Bye for now  
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**Padfoot  
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	12. Forgotten Times

**A/N**

**Right I could not be bothered waiting for silly reviews.  
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**But they are still very much wanted!  
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**This chapter has some graphic scenes in it, and a bit of swearing.  
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**Leave me your opinion on how I've done, because I'm not really happy with a part.**

**The first part is Blaise's view, then Draco's.**

**After that it'll be easy to differenciate.  
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**I only wrote Blaise's view so its clear :)  
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* * *

Blaise POV

_I hope he knows what he's getting into. She is one confusing woman. I wonder if she loves him back. Interesting... I must meddle and play cupid. Merlin knows I'm amazing at it. _Blaise thought smugly as he sat with his companions, Theodore Nott, Vincent Crabbe, and Gregory Goyle. The trio were playing wizard chess; Crabbe and Goyle, being rather dim, were teamed up against Nott. As usual, Nott was winning.

Blaise shivered; he wasn't cold, but the compartment had noticeably gotten colder. Usually the boys became too warm because of the bodies enclosed in the small room. Blaise frowned and looked out the window. A slight fog hung above the ground that the red steam train raced past and the window had gathered frost and small flecks of ice. This confused him, because even in the worst days of September, they never had ice or frost.

_Dementors. Draco. Deserae. Frick. _He thought in quick succession. He jumped from his seat and ran out the door, heading to the compartment that contained two of his best friends.

_Frick! - Frick! - Frick! _Was all he could think as he bounded down the train and finally reached their compartment and wrenched the door open.

"Dementors." That was all he said, because it was all he needed to say to make them get up and have their wands out.

* * *

Draco listened to Deserae's light, even breathing as he held her. His eyes were closed and he was replying his dream in his head, turning over the idea of being with Deserae. With her body pressed against him, he could barely notice the temperature drop. He didn't notice time passing like waves until Blaise promptly informed them of Dementors being in the nearby area.

He and Deserae almost fell over each other to get up and be prepared, but neither of them was fully aware of what would await them. They summarised that they could either keep a Patronus up for long enough to deter the Dementors or they would fail miserably and Deserae would be affected badly.

They knew for certain that they would all try their hardest to protect her, at all costs. No one really expected Slytherins to care for their families or friends, but they did. Well most of them did. They at least cared for their own, seeing as no one else would.

They did not speak, they did not know what would happen if they did. They could spew last minute testimonies to protect Dezzy and embarrass her, although in Draco's case, he could spew his feelings and be crushed if she did not feel the same.

The hyped up boys saw Deserae's shivers, either from fear or coldness and Draco promptly picked up the crumpled outer robe she had discarded and helped her put it on. He moved to get more chocolate slabs and frogs from his case as Deserae and Blaise slid together and started talking in hushed, nervous voices.

He heard snippets of the conversation, whenever one of them forgot he was also present. _He must be asking about earlier. Maybe she didn't want him to know. He is our friend, we can trust him. Of course we can if he's helping us with this... _Draco thought as he observed his two friends. He held out two slabs of chocolate for them to take and kept two chocolate frogs for himself. He thought of what to do once the Dementors came to their room while Deserae had slept peacefully, no need to disturb the tired girl.

"Here's what's going to happen." He announced confidentially, turning to Deserae as her and Blaise's conversation stopped talking. "Dezzy, you will be standing behind me and Zabini. We will stand in front of you and cast our Patronus together. If we're lucky, the Dementors will bugger off. If not so lucky, we'll likely pass out, and then my dear, it is up to you. We are like your pawns, okay? We are expendable. You need not worry if we fall, bruises smooses." He finished briefing them on his smart plan with a smirk. Deserae looked dazed, but she managed a weak nod and moved to the window, where she leant back and closed her eyes.

* * *

_Oh Merlin's aunts twice removed donkey. They're coming. Now. Unicorn turd. I'm not ready. They aren't ready. I don't want to remember what happened. Not again. I'm past it. _Deserae thought nervously as she screwed her eyes shut, trying to prevent the next hour or so by keeping them so. She knew it was only going to give her early wrinkles and a sore head so she opened them again and saw her two male friends now stood protectively in front of her, backs to her.

She was proud to be friends with these selfless boys...men? Whatever they were, they had matured greatly over the morning, if possible. They put aside all their problems and promised to protect her. They weren't as rash and brave as Gryffindor's, but by damn they would do whatever possible to look after the people who matter. So by technicality, Deserae mattered. She felt her nose tickle then her eyes water and she hastily sniffed and blinked the damned tears away.

_I matter to them. They care about me. I'm not worthless. I'm not better off dead. I won't give up because of some ruddy soul eating dunderheads! _She declared in her head, while lifting her head higher and squared her shoulders.

She would never be able to explain to them how much they meant to her at that moment, when they decided to lay down their protection for her. And she would never be able to explain how proud she was of them, as the door slid open and an ominous cloaked figure hovered in the doorway and they raised their wands in sync and said with conviction, "_Expecto Patronum!". _

* * *

Draco was fading, fast. He had pictured the moment in his dream when he held Deserae, _his _Deserae, and rested his hands on her stomach. He understood now. He had never understood clearer, nor would her ever. He would go to the ends of the earth; fight a million Dementors; stun a hundred pissy Uncles; complete a thousand and one horrid History of Magic essays for this one girl. The girl that he, right now, had to protect from this bloody stubborn Dementor! He had seen Blaise tremble, then fall ungracefully onto the floor in a heap. Personally he felt like doing the same, but he couldn't; he wouldn't. He had to protect _his _Deserae.

He could feel her shaking in fear behind him and he moved closer to her and took her hand in his left hand easily. She was cold, but she would be okay if she didn't get affected. He could feel himself start to wobble and Deserae squeezed his hand and whispered nothings to him as he too fell in exhaustion.

* * *

_No! No no no no no! Please God... Merlin NO! _She thought hysterically, Blaise had fallen about 4 seconds after casting his Patronus, and Draco followed suit 5 seconds, or 2 breaths after. For a brief moment, when he held her hand, Deserae thought it would be okay, but no. The Dementor kept coming for them and soon after Draco fell did Deserae notice how it felt to be in the presence of one without either two or one people casting a half assed Patronus for protection.

It felt like hell. Her mind was filled with taunting, reminding her of how little she meant, reminding her of every flaw she had and shoving them in her face. The self hating torture went on for mere seconds before she had sucked into a horrid memory. One she had thought she had gotten past, she had forgotten deep in the crevasses of her mind.

* * *

"Girl! Here! Now!" A manic screechy voice laced with malice and disgust snapped at her. She knew where she was, but it never looked like this before. Her homey living room was usually brightly lit by the roaring fire in the brick fireplace; crowded with tea cups and stacks of books left out of the large wooden bookcase and random assortments of blankets and pillows that had fallen from sofa and chairs. She quickly complied with the harsh voice's command and shrunk back when she stood in front of a taller figure.

A rough hand was raised and slapped her harshly across the face. She tried to recoil back defensively but another hand shot out and clenched her upper arm, digging nails into her skin hard enough to draw blood. She gasped in pain and regretted drawing the breath immediately, for the hand that slapped her before did so again. The slap left a resounding echo in the now thrashed dank room. She was thrown half haphazardly to the wall and she clashed painfully into the hard surface.

"Shut up. You're worthless, you know that? Your mother and father hate you, everyone hates you. You should have died in your sleep. Be quiet you worthless girl." The voice hissed disdainfully at her and even though her mind was foggy and darkness tinged her eyesight, she was made to stand in the middle of the room alone in a small circle. She was told that if she moved from the circle she would get hurt; they never specified but she didn't need to know. The living room door clanged open and her parents were shoved through the opening, large dark shadow like figures following behind them at a controlled pace.

Her mother looked up from the ground and to her small dark haired daughter, trying to smile but failing. Her father continued to look anywhere but at her and settled for staring round their ruined living space. Her mum made to move towards her and would have done so if she wasn't struck in the back with a bright red shot from a dark figures wand; her mother never stood a chance to react and she flopped face towards the ground, blood trickling from the corner of her mouth.

Now her father stole a glance toward her, standing impossibly straight and then staring at his dead wife. He did not cry, nor did he move towards either of the girls; he stood in shock.

"You will follow instructions. If you do not, you'll get worse than that filthy slut. Oh, yes, you know what I mean don't you, Richard?" The voice from before hissed venomously, the dark figures let out a cackle like laugh. "Girl, try walking to your... mother..." It whispered, suggesting something would happen if she did or did not comply. She saw no other choice and she stepped from the circle drawn on the ground.

Immediately the pain began. It started in her head, like a searing headache that you can only claw out from behind your eyes and she instinctively raised her hands to try and do so. It spread to her lungs, like a weight pressed on her chest, her breath was laboured. It moved onwards to her torso organs, and it felt like they were being sliced, torn and burned in every possible inch of inside surface. She heaved a cough and blood came spurting from her mouth and burnt her lips and throat. She didn't know what was happening but she didn't like it. She quickly scrambled back inside the circle that looked rather safe.

"Oh, no you don't bitch!" The feral voice rasped and she was yanked to her feet by her cropped black hair. Pain tore through her head, just like before the pain spread and she was coughing more blood and burning her throat and lips. The pain continued to lower in her stomach and she could literally feel the skin inside rip and she collapsed despite the hand in her hair, panting with the pain of it all.

"Leave her!" Her dad screamed. He sounded more than hurt, he sounded like he would rather take the pain, rather die than see his little girl in this state as well as his wife dead.

This time when her head was yanked back, her father was kneeled before her, wand to his throat. She took one glance up to the towering figure, and into those bottomless eyes as the wand was drawn across her father's throat and blood erupted over the floor and some splashing onto her legs and stomach.

* * *

"Oh lord, can you hear me? Miss? If you can hear me, I am Professor Lupin. You're okay. You're safe now. You're alright..." A kind, gravelly voice roused her from her horrible, vivid memory, but she was so close to the darkness that unconsciousness could bring that it sounded distant. She tried to hold on to the reassurances the man kept murmuring to her, but she wanted to give up. She'd been through so much in this one morning she was drained.

The man she heard shifted her and she was then held in strong arms, pressed against rough robes, cradled like a child. She relaxed into the hold and she succumbed to unconsciousness without any flashbacks of long forgotten times.

* * *

**A/N**

**Well there you go, I've made Deserae think some silly things; let you find out PART of her past and introduced Remus.  
**

**I bloody love Remus, if you didn't know!  
**

**I haven't started the next chapter yet, but I will get it done, beta'ed and up by next weekend :)**

**So I hope you enjoyed this long chapter  
**

**As always, please leave me some feedback.  
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**Even if its short, just tell me what you think about it and how I'm doing.  
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**Check my instagram messerpadfootforever too, I might have some sneak peak paragraphs on there about up coming chapters!  
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**Bye for now,  
**

**Padfoot  
**


	13. Nosy Professors

**A/N**

**I'm really sorry I haven't updated in ages!  
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**That will change now I can use the laptop :)  
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**I don't know about you but I want it sped up a tad, whatcha think?  
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**Leave me a review of how I'm doing so far PLEASE  
**

**ENJOY  
**

* * *

Draco knew he had failed. He had not been strong enough to withstand the power of the Dementors and his best friend will have been affected and probably in danger, most likely life-threatening. But he couldn't bring himself to wake from the darkness. He wouldn't have to face the guilt and shame of his failure; he wouldn't have to see the damage it caused.

Unfortunately for Draco, there was a very worried Professor willing him to wake up and he was wrenched from his peaceful slumber to face the music.

* * *

_It doesn't make sense._ The Professor was shabbily dressed, with well worn brown robes and sandy brown hair and golden eyes that screamed hidden secrets and comfort. The man confused him, but Draco felt the need to trust him, because he was the only adult available that could help his best friend and himself.

When Draco looked from the man stood beside the couch he lay on, he bolted upright at the sight of the damage from the Dementors. For the second time that day, his Deserae lay on the other couch as pale as snow. It shook his heart and his stomach clenched and his breathing became laboured. It hurt more than the first time, and he knew it was because he had failed the beautiful girl. She had been hurt or upset because of the vile soul suckers and it was his fault. Knowing this started an inner chant of _my fault my fault my fault my fault._

The Professor seemed to notice Draco's reaction of guilt and sadness and he shook his head lightly, as if reprimanding him for feeling bad for this happening.

"It was not your fault. Dementors are horrible determined creatures. Once they know some human has a complicated past that pains them, well they won't go away, willingly that is... You did the best you could, you and your friends, but you can't always save her. Sometimes you can only help her afterwards, do you understand?" The kind man had spoke gently, as if to a small frightened child, which in this case, he pretty much was. He searched Draco's silver eyes that were filling with tears once again and Draco nodded.

"That's a boy, now if you don't mind me asking, what the hell were you lot thinking standing up to a Dementor?" Draco's new Professor asked, half joking half serious. Draco just shrugged and tried to clear his teary eyes and clear his throat of the previous lump from seeing Deserae passed out again.

"Well, no matter what you may believe about Slytherins, we look out for our own. Deserae is one of us, and I would do anything, as would any right minded person, to help her. See she has more than the average painful past. It's rather difficult to untangle, but somehow she managed to explain it, partially, to me and I'm telling you, it's not nice at all." Draco stared straight ahead of him as he spoke, barely a whisper as he tried to explain the complicated jumble of his best friend's life. He risked a glance at the Professor who had yet to tell him who he was.

"Ah yes, so that is Miss Deserae Jones. I've been informed by the Headmaster about her rather tumultuous history." The man said rather sheepishly, looking to the still unconscious girl. He looked back to Draco, "So you are Draco Malfoy? Yes of course, the double of your father you are. Oh before I forget, you need chocolate young man. Eat, it'll help." He smiled at him, his eyes clouded as if remembering something as he handed a large bar of Honeydukes chocolate to him, which Draco took reluctantly. "By God's I haven't introduced myself, how rude. I am your new Defence teacher, Remus Lupin." He extended his pale, scarred hand again and Draco took it rather nervously while he began nibbling on the corner of the chocolate he was given. This man, Remus Lupin his name was, seemed to have mood changes rather quickly and honestly it unnerved Draco to not know what mood he would be in. _Oh joys..._

"Professor, where's my other friend, Blaise Zabini? Is he alright?" He had noticed the lack of Blaise and his snarky attitude, but he never felt the need to change the topic until the mood swings of his teacher.

"Oh yes, Mr Zabini is just fine, no problem there. He was a little shaken but it has been dealt with and he's off to his other chums. I've sent word ahead to Professor Snape about the effect of the visit on your friend, Miss Jones and of course, yourself and Mr Zabini."_ What the gods has he done? Severus will have a bloody cat when he reads that owl!_ He cleared his throat again to show some form of reply.

"Oh yes while I have you here, is there anything I should know about Miss Jones's past? I was informed of the state of her history, but not the actual events and goings on..." He trailed off looking somewhat worried. Draco nodded, taking time to sort out what he should tell Lupin. _Obviously I can't tell him everything, but maybe a simple outline of how it was? What about questions he should ask? Let Dezzy handle them or answer them myself? No, no. I'll answer; she'll get upset if she knows a teacher knows her past. Why wasn't she a bloody Gryffindor with all her self-righteous pride? Gods, _He rambled exasperatedly in his head.

He looked at his teacher as he formed his explanation, "Well as you know Dezzy and I met after being sorted together into Slytherin, and after the first few days of her being quiet and not even partaking in class, I got worried." Draco looked away from the man and to his best friend frowning, "I confronted her and she told me that her uncle doesn't like her talking about magic or even talking at all. If you're wondering why she puts up with her uncle, her parents died when she was 7 and then she had to live with him. She also told me that he was quite nice on his good days, but I have no idea what would seem nice to a child when they'd been with someone who hates magic and their own niece!" Draco nearly yelled the last line and he had to force himself to breathe and calm down, but he had no need to go on because Lupin seemed like he had something to say.

"Well, spit it out. No sense in not voicing how disgusting her uncle was. I always hated the- rotten man." Draco wanted to say something much more descriptive about the horrible piece of work that he was but could not in front of a man that would soon teach him.

"No it's not that, it's something else entirely. As much as I agree with your displeasure towards her uncle, do you know if he ever...physically hurt her? This could be important for the Headmaster to know, so please if you tell me I can help her." Lupin begged him and looked into Draco's grey eyes as he pleaded but it was wasted effort. Draco knew Deserae would not want the old coot or any teacher to know that extent of her home life. She believed she coped wonderfully as it was, even if she did get hurt sometimes. So Draco faked not knowing anything of the abuse, even if it was the one chance to deal with the pathetic horrible disgusting muggle that hurt his Deserae.

"I'm sorry sir, I don't know that much. She never said and I've never seen any physical proof. If I find out she has been I'll inform you or Professor Snape." Draco lied smoothly, using his teacher voice to get what he wanted. Oh how Deserae hated the teacher voice, it's sickeningly sweet and ass-kissy rolled into one well formed drawl.

Lupin seemed to deflate at this but nodded in agreement. He stood and looked thoughtfully at Deserae for a moment before turning and heading to the door. He turned before heading out the open compartment door to speak.

"If either of you need me, I'm in the compartment three down, alright? Please, find me when she wakes up, if you need to of course." He smiled briefly before leaving and closing the door silently behind him.

* * *

After making sure that Lupin was back into his compartment, Draco let out a heavy sigh of relief followed by, "Bugger that! No way in hell am I going to get you when my girl wakes up,". He looked about the compartment for something to do while Deserae was out of it, until he remembered his Potions book. He smirked to himself at being such a nerd, but he fetched it anyway and doused his problems by methods, measures and ingredients for a while.

* * *

**Well there you go, for now at least.  
**

**It's going to move a lot faster now, because I am getting a bit bored writing in a small time frame.  
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**I hope you enjoyed it and please tell me what you think of Remus, cause Remy is a wee cutie!  
**

**Well I think so anyhow!  
**

**Feel free to leave me a review ;)  
**

**Padfoot**


	14. Nerds and New Laws

**A/N**

**Well here it is, finally!  
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**Hope you enjoy! :D  
**

* * *

Draco's reading was interrupted by a loud shout of, "Yo, nerdy-kins! We're near Hogsmeade; wake Sleeping Beauty up or she's getting an Aguamenti to the face!" Needless to say who it was, the face to match the voice entered the small compartment mere seconds after the warning, wand in hand.

"No, Blaise." Draco reprimanded lightly while standing and moving to block the other's shot at Deserae, previously named Sleeping Beauty-whoever she was-.

"Oh come on Malfoy, you're no fun." Blaise said sternly with a raised eyebrow and a smirk. _Well if he wants fun, let him have it. _Draco thought with a smirk of his own and stepped aside like an agile cat.

"Go ahead, but let me move my book; it is new after all." Draco said again, knowing this could only end badly, like it had for him but a week ago. Blaise looked at him strangely but let him proceed none the less, and after he had his book safely stored in his trunk- lifting a fallen one of Deserae's and also putting it back into the trunk- the fun began.

Blaise cast the spell and Draco wordlessly raised a Protego Totalum charm as he moved to stand in the furthest away spot he could manage without leaving the small room. _He's for it. _Draco thought with a grin of great happiness- even though Blaise was Draco's friend he couldn't not love seeing his friend fail miserably-.

As the water hit the sleeping girls' face, Draco didn't breathe. He thought his heart had stopped, until Deserae sprang on her feet, quick as a cat, and rammed her shoulder into Blaise's stomach in a painful tackle. _Ouch, least I got spells cast at, not physical violence. _Draco thought with a pang of sympathy. Deserae may have looked small and delicate, but she could pack a punch.

"Shit!" Blaise cried out as the girl twirled them around and dropped him to the floor in a heap, like a crumpled doll.

"Oops! Sorry, Blaise. Guess I don't know my own strength, eh?" Deserae chuckled and lightly plopped down onto the seat again before being wrenched into a bone crushing hug from a crying Draco.

"Oh Dezzy, I love you, you insane, unpredictable witch! You are bloody amazing you know that?" Draco said past the laughter and tears slipping from his steely eyes. He was telling the truth including the part about loving her, but she didn't need to know that, yet...

* * *

"Draco, move your butt! I need to get ready. Out, out!" Deserae wailed at her friend, as he stood by the door laughing. He refused to go get into his school robes in the bathroom, so she could use the compartment to change.

"No way, you go!" Draco argued back and shuffled from foot to foot, knowing she'd make him leave through violence-magical or physical- or by convincing him but he didn't like the odds either way, so he gave in honourably and made sure to give the door a sliding slam when he left.

Deserae waited a few seconds before letting out a long sigh, "Gods when did he get so bloody good looking?" She whispered exasperatedly to herself as she began to change, careful to watch her makeup.

"It's simply not fair, being best friends with someone that hot. It should be illegal; that would be a crazy suggestion for the Ministry. New law! Being sexy is now a criminal offence, Azkaban worthy!" She continued to mutter insane comments about good looking blondes with grey eyes and perfect arses as she shook her head to clear it of a certain blonde haired, grey eyed friend with a rather perfect behind.

"Good god, I'm going to be driven insane by him, aren't I?" She asked herself rhetorically. "Look. I'm already talking to myself. Good lord, I should make a bet with myself. See how long it takes for me to go insane or end up fancying him. Actually, I'd rather not jinx myself." She shook her head as she finally finished donning on her black over-robes, with the Slytherin House symbol on her chest.

She flumped onto the chair to swap shoes, from her small black ballet pumps to an inch high pair of stiletto's Narcissa bought her. She twisted her foot this way and that trying to figure if she looked okay when Blaise sauntered past, looked in and wolf whistled her. _Oh he's _certainly_ for it this time._

* * *

"Excuse me-"

"Ouch-move!"

"You're in my _way!_"

"Bit crazy here, eh Dez?" Draco almost had to shout over the overload of voices and people pushing and shoving their way from the train corridor and outside to the Hogsmeade platform.

Blaise was ahead of Draco and Deserae and because of the stark contrast of dark skin compared to the pale complexion of his friends, he looked more menacing than Draco ever could as he shoved and elbowed, glowered and threatened anyone that dared get near or in the way. Deserae was trailed along after Draco like an obedient child until they got past the large crowd and into a Thestral drawn carriage. In second year the Thestral's had scared Deserae, she even resorted to asking Draco about them after staring absently at them for a few minutes, but now the skeletal horses were good friends; she made a mental note to visit them again soon.

They were jostled and bounced up the path to the front of Hogwarts where lit candles hovered at the door as students, now dressed in school robes, mulled about waiting for friends and people shoved their way in, not stopping to admire the sight around them; Hogwarts at night.

Beyond the mountains of Hogwarts beautiful backdrop, the sinking sun shone on the lake, reflecting and making patterns dance across nearby grass and trees. The roar of students seemed to dull to Deserae's ears when she focused on the beauty of her school, her home and she wished that she could sit out in the dying sunset instead of in at the feast. It seemed so surreal and peaceful here, unlike in the castle walls, where she could be targeted by Pansy or anyone else, or even challenged by subjects-though she was smart and actually liked class- nothing could ever be chosen over _this. _

"Dez, stop dawdling. We have to get inside." Draco murmured in her ear while trying to tug her through the open doors. She frowned then followed, vowing to come out tomorrow, Draco be damned.

* * *

**A/N**

**I loved adding some humour to this and it was great to write.  
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**I hope you don't mind me moving faster in the story but I just want to get to the good part!  
**

**Leave me a review on how I'm doing cause it means a lot to me :D  
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**I'll update soon!  
**

**Padfoot  
**


	15. Disappearing Acts

**A/N**

**Well, after ages, which I'm so so sorry for, here's chapter 15!  
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**I had writers block and the only reason I was able to get this out, was because of my best friend and beta, Miss Moony.  
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**Really, we whisper the chapter plots to each other during our History classes.  
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**She kicked me into gear, and hopefully I'll keep the chapters coming!  
**

**Enjoy!  
**

* * *

When Deserae and Draco finally filed into the Great Hall, Deserae looked to around her as her friend shoved and sneered and made derogatory comments loudly about Potter again, not seeming to actually care if she was listening, manoeuvring them over to the Slytherin table.

Luckily Blaise had gotten to the table first and saved seats -actually Crabbe and Goyle just threatened anyone who came near- at the end nearer the door and further away from prying Professors. Deserae sent a quick smile to the already sitting Blaise and sat down beside him, Draco joining her on her right, while Crabbe and Goyle sat on the other side. She soon drifted off in her thoughts about the sunset outside and the great pranks she could play in the upcoming days.

"Are you even paying attention?" Blaise whispered in her ear, knocking her concentration on pranks. She laughed quietly, receiving a strange look from Draco; the monkey-boys were too busy hollering at new Slytherin firsties to notice anything. She turned slightly on the row to whisper back but when she did she saw Snape glaring at her. _It could have been this end, not just me. Maybe he wants to talk about the train? God, I don't want to talk to _him _about feelings! Does he actually have any?! _She thought, knowing she wouldn't be able to get out of talking to him if he wanted to talk bad enough.

_I want to disappear; he's still looking at me! Damn, damn, damn! _She thought frantically, then she realised she was staring back at Snape and quickly looked to Draco, who seemed to have noticed her discomfort and had followed her look. He frowned and shrugged, admitting Snape knew of the Dementor trouble. She had to get out of there. She couldn't just sit there, waiting for Snape to talk about it. She needed out. She _had_ to get out.

Before she even realised what was happening, she had fallen off the row, her back giving out waves of pain from the collision with the stone floor and having a panic attack. She burst into tears, gasping in air like she was unable to breathe and shaking violently; Blaise scrambled down to her and cradled her against him as Draco tried to rile up the goons, booing and hissing at the other houses and cheering to make up for their sudden disappearance and give them some cover.

If Snape saw her fall, she was for it.

The thought made her shake and try her best to form a ball as her tears flowed faster, clouding her vision and soaking her face. Blaise was shushing her, whispering nonsensical things in her ear and rubbing her back, trying to calm her over the sorting that still took place, and the cheering from each house that followed. Thankfully, the Slytherin House table was on the very left of the hall and the only thing in front of the pair was stone. No Slytherin that saw her panic attack would tell the other houses, for now, she was safe. They could say it was an after effect of the damned Dementors.

"Dezzy, you need to calm down and tell me what's wrong. You can tell me. I won't tell Draco unless you want me to. I'm here for you, you're safe, and you're okay..." the dark skinned wizard whispered to her as he held to him, rocking back and forth slowly and stroking her hair, trying to find some way to calm her down.

"Do you want to leave? We can go, we can sneak out...you're okay... I'm here..." He continued to murmur in her ear and she nodded with might into his chest. "Okay then, disillusionment charm go!" He mock cheered and took his wand out of his robe pocket, quietly muttering the charm to make them invisible to those around him.

Now safe knowing no one could see them, they slowly got to their feet, Blaise having to hold tightly onto Deserae as she wobbled and swayed with the sudden rush.

"Come on, here we go. Don't worry, I got ya," He urged her quietly, thanking his brilliant mind for picking the very end of the row, so near the door, that all they really had to do was wait until the commotion began; simple really. They hobbled to the door and stood awkwardly, hoping either Filch the Useless would scamper in, or the big hall doors would open on their own accord.

Remus Lupin, being the outcast he was, was sat at the end of the Professors head table, looking out over the cheering students and small first years. He remembered how scared he was whenever he was being sorted, and he tried to smile kindly to those who looked his way. Not many did.

Sometimes being a werewolf had its advantages. For one, he could smell the food that the elves had finally sent up to them, now that the sorting was completed; he could hear every conversation, focus in on what people were saying and thankfully block some of the chatter out; he could feel the soft cotton fabric of his shirt, and the rough texture of his cardigan that came just past the sleeves, brushing his wrist lightly; he could also make out a strange shape at the huge double doors.

He focused in on the outline, making out two separate bodies, one hunching over and the other standing tall. This confused him greatly.

He looked to the tables and peered down the rows; someone was trying to leave the Great Hall; without knowledge of the teachers. His mind immediately guessed it was a couple looking for some privacy, until he saw the huge gap beside Draco Malfoy and those other two, Crabbe and Goyle.

Ah so Miss Deserae Jones wanted a bit of space with, from what he could see, Blaise Zabini. He didn't know they were involved, he actually thought her and Malfoy were an item. How strange, but willing to give them a chance to explain, he intervened.

He bent his head towards the table and reached out his wand, silently casting a heating charm over the room. He slipped his wand back into his pocket and tipped his head to his old Professor, Minnie McGonagall.

"Should we open the door? It's sort of warm in here," He suggested quietly, and although it rarely happened, she agreed. She in turn whispered to Headmaster Dumbledore and he also agreed. He waved his wand in a wide arc grandly and the huge doors swung open. No one really paid attention, seeing as they had just been gifted with amazing food, but Remus could still faintly make out the shapes as they burst through the open doors and in the direction of the dungeons.

He would be having words with those two.

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**I know its shorter than normal, but it was honestly all I was able to give!**

**The next chapter will be better, and I'm going to keep speeding through, because it gets better!  
**

**Please, some reviews would really help me keep going :)  
**

**Hope you liked it!  
**

**If not well, sorry 'bout that, but if it's something I can change, leave it in a review! ;D  
**

**Bye for now!  
**


	16. Firmly Frozen

**A/N**

**I am so so sorry! I haven't updated in far too long! **

**A longer, more important note will follow at the end!**

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"Dez, do you want to tell me what in-the-name-of-Merlin's-saggy-behind that was about?!" Blaise's concerned and shocked voice questioned beside her, but she was too focused on breathing and not fainting to actually reply, or want to.

They walked the desolate halls, their footsteps echoing and resonating on the surrounding stone walls. It seemed so peaceful, with the noise of students being abandoned in the Great Hall behind them.

They walked and walked, passing the dungeons a while ago, and heading somewhere they hadn't really figured out. They ambled in silence, both lost in their thoughts, one about the other, the other on regaining control.

"Look, I know you are kind of preoccupied with," He took a sideways glance at her, still breathing heavy and still leaking tears from red rimmed eyes, "breathing and all that, but you can talk to me. Tell me anything and I'll not say anything to anyone, and I'll do my best to help, kid, honest." He looked at her again, her black hair mussed from burying head into his shoulder, her shining blue eyes a little clearer than before, 'Cause, well, you mean a lot to me, and I know something ain't been right, and it isn't right now, but I'm here. I'll always be here, hear me girl?" Now he stopped walking, grabbed her elbow lightly and turned her to face him so she understood he was serious, that he really did care.

She looked at him, reading his eyes and expression, but finding only honesty and concern, something she wasn't fully familiar with, except from the Malfoy's. She nodded and smiled at him, glad to see some of the tension in him fade.

"I have an idea, how about we stuff this walking lark and head to the lake? It'll be lovely at sunset!" Deserae proposed with a sudden bounce in her step. Blaise looked at her strangely but complied, happy to see her happy again.

They walked back towards the Great Hall, then out the huge front doors from which they entered earlier. The dying sun lay in the distance, hovering over the lake; the grass danced in the early evening breeze, the birds chirped and sang as they flew around the grounds.

"So, what caused that?" Blaise asked gently, that being the panic attack. Deserae shrugged, not knowing how to explain what really caused it.

They walked lightly over to the edge of the lake, seeing an occasional tentacle rise out of the water to wave happily at them. Blaise remained standing while Deserae flopped gracefully onto the ground, fingers inches from the water's edge.

She trailed her fingertips through the ice-cold water, peering at the algae, small fish and other things she was sure she wouldn't want to know about. Having an idea, Deserae slowly pulled her fingers up, arching her hand and hoping it would work.

A small but steady stream of water rose with her hand, floating beneath her palm, gently bobbing and moving with the wind. Deserae's blue eyes widened comically; she'd done it!

"Blaise! Look at this!" She called back to her friend, who had opted to lie back and bask in the autumnal sunshine. He now rose with a displeased look at being disturbed, but the look quickly turned to a look of shock, awe, fear and confusion.

"How- how the bloody hell are you doing that? What spell did you use?!" He questioned her, and though he was practically shouting, Deserae's concentration remained steady and the water waited patiently.

"I didn't use a spell, I used will you idiot." She joked, because she hadn't used a spell, she just wanted to see if it would work. She'd tried it many times before, but only getting a tiny trickle of water.

"Well, how are you doing that? You can't just make water flow from a source to the air without a spell!" He claimed, getting more curious and afraid than before.

"I don't know! I kind of just… happens…" She explained lamely, looking at him, pleading for him to understand.

"You should tell Dumbledore, I haven't seen this before." He concluded after a moment of thought and a little staring contest with his friend.

"No, I'm not going to tell Dumbledore. He's nice and all, but he's a bit loopy." She disagreed, shaking her head. She was slowly losing patience and concentration, and it showed in the way the water began to quiver.

"If you don't, I will." Blaise said quietly. Deserae turned from the water edge to face him, water stream vibrating under her hand.

"Don't, please, it's barely anything anyway. It's taken me years to be able to do this." She tried to reason and down play what she actually could do.

"Yeah, right. You tell Draco, I'm going to catch ole Dumbe-ly-dore, the feast is bound to be over by now." He stated, turning to walk back up to the front doors.

"No! You can't!" She shouted, flinging her hands out to stop him, somehow. The ball of water flew from her hand to Blaise's ankle, wrapping around and freezing; Blaise's foot firmly frozen to the grass. He spun round to face her, shock evident on his face, fear in his eyes.

"What the hell!?" He demanded, and then started shouting for her to get it off, kicking the ice around his foot with his unfrozen one.

Shocked, Deserae gawked at the foot, and then admitted, "I have no idea what is happening right now."

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**A/N**

**PLEASE REVIEW and tell me what you think about her new 'talent' :)**

**And, well, after much debate, I've decided to put this on a hiatus, **

**because I've had writers block for quite a while on this and**

** I'm struggling to pull together even small chapters, **

**please review this chapter though, **

**I'll keep trying to write some if I can, sorry dears :(**

**P.S- Sorry to dissapoint, Matt. **


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